Eric van der Woodsen Quotes
Eric: I thought Damien got me. You know, we could just hang out together and do nothing. He was there for me.
Rufus: That kind of a guy always is.
Eric: So what say we go back to your place, pop in some Call of Duty and celebrate?
Damien: Listen man, I don't want you to take this the wrong way, but I think we're pretty much done here.
Eric: I'm sure Ben was a perfectly nice guy when Serena met him. But you lock anybody up for three years.
Dan: And for a crime he didn't commit.
Eric: I have seen every episode of Oz. That place can change a man.
Contrary to what Rufus and Serena believe, he hasn't changed. He beat up a friend of mine just last week. We have got to get rid of this guy. Show everybody how dangerous he is.
Rufus: You said you were going to help find Ben an apartment, not pay him to disappear.
Eric: Mom paid someone off again. Well we should make this a drinking game.
Lily: Ben Donovan has information that can ruin this family. What's wrong with not wanting him around?
Lily: Why aren't you dressed?
Eric: Uh... shirt, pants. Yeah, I'm dressed.
Lily: Look, I know you disapprove of me, but can't you please do so in a tuxedo?
Eric: What's he doing here? Trying to recruit another virgin to use as your drug mule?
Damien: I'd ask 'are you available' but I have to run.
Eric: How are you feeling?
Serena: Betrayed. Thanks.
Lily: Oh! Blair, Dorota. What are you doing here?
Blair: Just bringing a little tradition. I'm spending the holidays with Daddy and Roman in Paris. I figured since we usually spend this day together that, you know, um... Is Serena here?
We thought she was with you.
Blair: No, I haven't seen her since Chuck's party. She never came home.
Eric: Okay, alright. Now I'm worried.
Lily: Charles?
Chuck: She's not at The Empire.
Lily: Well then where the hell is she?
Eric: Do we have relatives I don't know about?
Rufus: It's always a possibility.
Serena: Hey, why are you guys eating? I thought we were going to Sarabeth's.
Eric: Ah, we decided we could spread out better here. There's more room to work.
Serena: On what, your calculus homework?
Eric: Your love life. It's a little something called "Dan vs. Nate". We're here to help.
Elliot: And we brought protractors.
That's their biggest secret? I was expecting something a little bit more American Psycho. Not stabbing a homeless man, but at least feeding a cat to an ATM.
