Cerie: Guess what, everyone? I'm engaged!
Frank: Hey, this isn't going to change the way you dress or eat lollipops, is it?
Cerie: No.
Frank: Oh, then, congratulations.

Tracy: I want to hold a mirror up to society and then win world record for biggest mirror.
Frank: He's totally right.

Frank: Hey, uh, you got anything about being a dad? People eat that garbage up.
Tracy: I like to walk around my house naked, to remind my oldest son who's still got the biggest ding-dong.
Pete: No
Tracy: Or I could tell the story of how I met Sharon Stone.
Pete: What was that?
Tracy: I was pooping in the ladies' room at The Ivy-
Pete: No.

Jack: Are you familiar with Six Sigma?
Frank: Oh, yeah. It's a special kinda G.I. Joe.
Jack: It's Frank, right?
Frank: Yes, sir.
Jack: Six Sigma says that a manager must understand every aspect of the business that he or she oversees.
Liz: Which means?
Jack: I'll be here everyday. Soaking it up.

Pete: Oh my god! Wha... what are you wearing?!
Frank: You're making me gay.
Liz: It's a joke, obviously. I'm wearing this as a joke. Bunch of comedy writers don't know a joke, jeez. [goes to her office]
Frank: I just threw up in my mouth.
Liz: I said it's a joke!

Frank: Yo Tray, we got a problem.
Tracy: [as Jefferson] Pray who be this Tracy Jordan thou speakest of?
Frank: Uh, President Jefferson, we got a problem.
Tracy: Speakest!
Frank: That horse ate your wig.
Tracy: Well, stand guard by his rump and await it in his droppings!
Lutz: Or we could probably just go get a new wig?
Tracy: A-ha! I like you, young man; you shall run my university.

Liz: Okay, everyone, welcome back. Some of you may be wondering what happened between me and my boyfriend Floyd this summer. The answer is we did break up, but I am doing fine.
Frank: Is Floyd the Black guy?

Liz: What do guys like?
Frank: Porn.
Liz: No, I mean if you were to go on a date with a girl, how would you want her to act?
Frank: Like she was in a porn.

Tracy: So, how you doing over there, Theo Huxtable.
Toofer: I'm doing good.
Tracy: Nah-uh. Superman does good; you're doing well. You need to study your grammar, son.
Frank: [to Toofer] Wow, that was embarrassing for you.

30 Rock Quotes

Jenna: Oh, I'm not worried because I have something the other actors don't.
Liz: Don't say your sexuality.
Jenna: My sexuality.
Liz: Oh, god, Jenna! When has that ever worked?
Jenna: When has it not worked?!

Passing out and cursing on St. Patrick's Day. Is nothing sacred anymore?