George: Was it a scratch or a pick?
Jerry: It was a pick!
George: Hey, it's me you're talking to! Was there any nostril penetration?
Jerry: (stutters) There may have been some accidental penetration!

So we go to her apartment and she goes to the bathroom. I'm cursing myself, "now how do I get out of here?" Then it hit me like a bolt of lightning. The pick!

(from outside the plane, we don't hear him but he is saying) KRAMER!!!!

George: You don't understand, there's a blurb about me in this magazine!
Prisoner: A blurb?! You're a blurb! Check out the cover, idiot!
Guard: All right, let's go.
(George checks out the cover shot which shows a picture of the aforementioned prisoner with the caption "Caught!" written below.)

George: You bought non-refundable tickets, you idiot!
Kramer: She talked me in to it. She said it was the best deal.

George: They're not here! You cost me fifty bucks!
Kramer: Look at you! You run like a girl! Run like a man! Lift your knees!

George: But you are, blanche. You are in the shackles!
Prisoner: You son of a (gets taken away)
George: (happily) Oh, I can't wait to read my Time magazine. Last copy too. Maybe I'll read it tomorrow, in the park! It's supposed to be a beeyoouutiful day! Have a nice life, sentence that is! Oh, you miserable

(singing) I like to stop at the duty free shop. I like to stop at the duty free shop. I like to stop at the duty free shop.

Kramer and George

No-no-no, Kramer. Kramer! Kramer! You cannot abandon people in the middle of an airport pickup! It's a binding social contract. We we must go forward not back.

Jerry: What happened?
Elaine: It was, uh, John John.
Jerry and George: Ohhhhh. John John.

Estelle: George I'm huuunnnggry!
George: Hang on, ma, hang on.

George: I didn't know whether to try and keep her from falling, or zip up.
Jerry: What did you do?
George: I zipped up!
Elaine: So, she fell?
George: Yeah. Well, I couldn't run over there the way I was!

Seinfeld Quotes

Kramer: THE BEACH!!! (enters the apartment) You smell like the beach. What's the name of that perfume you're wearing?
Tia: It's Ocean by CALVIN KLEIN.
Kramer: CALVIN KLEIN? No, no. That's my idea. They, they stole my idea. Y'see I had the idea of a cologne that makes you smell like you just came from the beach.
Jerry: I know look at this (shows an ad from CK)
Kramer: (shocked) Whooo! That's you! What is going on here? The gyp, he laughs at me then he steals my idea. I could have been a millionaire. I could have been a fragrance millionaire, Jerry. They're not going to get away with this. (leaves)

Hoh hoh hoh, yes! Yes...Cleveland 117, San Antonio 109.

Tor