Grampa Simpson Quotes
Season 24, Episode 14: "Gorgeous Grampa "
Grampa: I don't ride side-saddle. I'm as straight as a submarine.
• Rating: Unrated
Season 24, Episode 8: "To Cur With Love"
Grampa: Unfortunately, like all true stories, this one has a crappy ending.
Bart: You have a story with an ending.
• Rating: Unrated
Bart: He's alive!
Marge: And he didn't pee on the floor.
Grampa: For me that's a perfect day.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 23, Episode 14: "At Long Last Leave"
Homer: Sorry, Dad. I was afraid the dragon wouldn't cough the moon back up.
Grampa: You idiot! Dragon always coughs the moon back up.
• Rating: Unrated
Season 23, Episode 11: "The D'oh-cial Network"
Grampa: And I created an alcoholic hippo.
Homer: You never showed it to me!
Grampa: A stupid alcoholic hippo!
• Rating: 4.3 / 5.0
Season 23, Episode 9: "Holidays of Future Passed"
Grampa: I'm Santa!? Oh, now I'll never die.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 22, Episode 20: "Homer Scissorhands"
Grampa: You two look good - open casket good.
• Rating: Unrated
Season 22, Episode 18: "The Great Simpsina"
Grampa: In 1957 I saw him turn turn the Secretary of Agriculture into the Secretary of the Interior. It was hell on their wives, but it sure brought down corn prices. Built a house out of corn. It was the worst home I ever owed? when it got really hot it smelled like Frito's.
• Rating: Unrated
Season 22, Episode 15: "The Scorpion's Tale"
Grampa: What can I do for you? Eat something green? Vote for someone brown?
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Grampa: The television only has one channel.
Aide: That's a fish tank!
Grampa: You're a fish tank.
Aide: That was hurtful. I wish I was a fish tank, then I could filter out his nasty words.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
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Total Quotes: 112