Modern Family
Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABCHayley Dunphy Quotes
Claire: You're grounded for four weeks!
Haley: Why don't you just double it and make it 10?
Alex: Do you not see how much you need to study?!?
Claire: Quick, quick tell me something to say that will freak him out.
Haley: Tell him I'm pregnant!
Look at him getting coffee and not putting chocolate in it! He's so mature!
Haley
Phil: It's like a movie theater, library and a music store all rolled in to one... awesome pad.
Alex [to Haley]: A library is a place where people get books
Haley [to Alex]: A movie theater is a place where people go on dates.
Haley: Oh my God, gross, I can't even picture you with a woman.
Claire: Thank you.
Never getting my driver's license, or getting one and the picture sucks.
Haley [on her biggest fear]
Alex: Haley, found your jacket.
Haley: WHY IS EVERYONE ON ME?
Phil: Goodbye Dunphy Christmas. Haley, I guess you're not getting that car.
Haley: I was getting a car?
Phil: No, I was lying. Because that's what Dunphys do now, we're liars.
Haley: This is kind of an important party.
Jay: The last thing you to do is insult someone when they invite you.
Haley: Exactly.
[Jay walks out]
Haley: OMG. That was so easy.
Alex: You really don't understand what just happened, do you?
Every time I go over to grandpa's, Manny just stares at me the whole time.
Haley
Alex: Did you know fencing goes back to the 12th century?
Haley: You know what's even nerdier than fencing? knowing when it began
Luke: I don't think you're a nerd, Alex
Alex: Shut up dork
Haley: Hey mom?
Claire: Yeah?
Haley: Can I have forty dollars for lunch?
Claire: Forty dollars?
Haley: I also need a book for school.
Claire: A book?
Haley: I want a dress.
Claire: Do you have any idea what a bad liar you are?
Alex: I'd be more worried that she couldn't come up with a single book title
