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The-big-bang-theory

Wolowitz: You love that spot.
Sheldon: No, I love my mother. My feelings for my spot are much greater. It is the singular location in space around which revolves my entire universe. And now it's yours.

I just wanna put it out there in case I inadvertently squirt any pheromones in your direction.

This is the worst cobbler I've ever eaten. It tastes like it's made of actual ground-up shoemaker.

I was once robbed by a pre-op transsexual on J-Date and that didn't even crack my top ten.

Wolowitz: I took a scuba diving course over the summer, but it turns out I'm terrified of the ocean.
Bernadette: That's too bad.
Wolowitz: You wouldn't know anybody who wants to buy a wet suit? Boy's large?

Wolowitz: Why do you even want this here? Its size is completely disproportionate to its purpose!
Raj: Considering its purpose was to piss you off, I'd say it's spot on.

Wolowitz: Would you have opened the door if you knew it was me?
Penny: Not since I found out the teddy bear you gave me had a webcam in it.

Wolowitz: I love watching Raj and Sheldon try to work together.
Leonard: Yeah, it's like if Alien and Predator decided to go partners in a Jamba Juice.

Leonard: So, this is nice. First time we've all gotten together to eat.
Amy (to Sheldon): You're right. He's a festival of humdrum chitchat.
Leonard: Okay, that's all I got. Howard, you're up.
Wolowitz: Um, tell us about your work, Amy.
Amy: I doubt you'd understand. Sheldon tells me you only have a master's degree.
Wolowitz: Raj, do you have any questions for Amy?

Wolowitz: Women, huh? Can't live with 'em; can't successfully refute their hypotheses.
Sheldon: Amen to that.

Someday, when you have varicose veins, I'll show you how to massage them.

Penny: God, he's an ass when he drinks.
Wolowitz: He's an ass he doesn't. You just don't hear it.

Displaying quotes 181 - 192 of 309 in total

TBBT Quotes

Sheldon: I recently read that during World War Two, Joseph Stalin had a research program to create supersoldiers by having women impregnated by gorillas.
Howard: What a sick use of science.
Raj: Hey, as long as the baby's healthy.
Amy: I wonder if Stalin considered any other animals.
Leonard: Hippos are the deadliest creature. A half-human, half-hippo soldier would be pretty badass.
Howard: Yes, but when they're hungry-hungry, you can stop them with marbles.
Sheldon: Yeah, the correct animal for interspecies supersolider is koala. You would wind up with an army so cute it couldn't be attacked.

As soon as we get home, I want to have coitus with Amy. Okay, she can't hear.

Sheldon
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