The Big Bang Theory

Howard Wolowitz Quotes (Page 19)

Wolowitz: They're called tattoo sleeves. I bought them online. Raj got a set too. Put them on, have sex with some freaky girl with her business pierced and I can take them off and still be buried in a Jewish cemetery

 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0

Raj: What happened?
Sheldon: Obviously another carnal fiasco with the 'Shiksee' goddess.
Howard: Shiksa. Shik-Sa.
Sheldon: Forgive me. Yiddish was not spoken in East Texas. And if it was, it wasn't spoken for long.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Wolowitz: Sex is never the way I dreamed it was going to be.
Raj: Because in your dreams, you're a horse from the waist down.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Wolowitz: you're missing the point, a Shiksa goddess is not an actual goddess, we prey on them, not to them
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Leonard: Will you take that stupid red hat off?
Wolowitz: No, I want to blend in
Raj: To what? Toy story?
 • Rating: Unrated

Leonard: I don't want to go to Texas
Wolowitz: Alright and I do? My people already crossed the desert once. We're done

 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Wolowitz [about his mustache]: I call it the Clooney
Raj: I call it the Mario and Luigi, but whatever
 • Rating: 4.5 / 5.0

Wolowitz: Sheldon. You remember the first few weeks; we were looking for magnetic monopoles and not finding anything, and you were acting like an obnoxious, giant dictator?
Raj: I thought we were going to be gentle with him.
Wolowitz: That's why I added the "tator"
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Wolowitz [after seeing Penny jump Leonard]: Damnit, I should have gone over and said we were back
Raj: Yeah, it was "first come, first serve."
 • Rating: 3.5 / 5.0

Wolowitx: You think you can put up with Sheldon?
Raj: Well I'm a hindu. My religion teaches that if we suffer in this life, we're rewarded in the next. Three months in the north pole with Sheldon and I'm reborn as a well hung billionaire with wings
 • Rating: 4.9 / 5.0

Are we missing your favorite quote from "?" Submit it here and get points for adding quotes!