The Big Bang Theory

The Big Bang Theory

Thursdays 8:00 PM on CBS

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Howard Wolowitz Quotes (Page 22)

Season 2, Episode 16: "The Cushion Saturation"
Wolowitz: Okay. One way to look at this is I'm getting new equipment and you're not, and that's unfair. But a better way to look at this is that I'm getting sex and you're not, and that's delightful!
 • Rating: Unrated
Leslie: Isn't it nice when your good fortune makes others miserable?
Wolowitz: You know, most people don't get that!
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
Wolowitz [about his phone call]: Looks like I'm going to have sex tonight
Penny: His right hand is calling him?

 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 2, Episode 14: "The Financial Permeability"
Leonard: Okay, is everyone clear on the plan?
Wolowitz: Yes. Koothrappali is going to wet himself, I'm going to throw up, Sheldon is going to run away, and you're going to die. Shall we synchronize our watches?
 • Rating: 4.8 / 5.0
Season 2, Episode 12: "The Killer Robot Instability"
Wolowitz: Don't get the wrong idea; the way I see it, I'm halfway to pity sex
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Wolowitz: How is "doable" anything but a compliment?
 • Rating: 1.0 / 5.0
Season 2, Episode 11: "The Bath Item Gift Hypothesis"
Sheldon: If I were to give you this gift basket, based on that action alone, and no other data, infer and describe the hypothetical relationship that exists between us.
Employee: Excuse me?
Sheldon: Here. [gives woman gift basket] Now, are we friends, colleagues, lovers? Are you my grandmother?
Employee: I don't understand what you're talking about, and you're making me a little uncomfortable.
Wolowitz: See, sounds just like you and Penny. We'll take it.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 2, Episode 8: "The Lizard-Spock Expansion"
Mrs. Wolowitz: Howard, get the door!
Howard: Really, is that what you do when someone knocks? I had no idea
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 2, Episode 7: "The Panty Piñata Polarization"
Raj: We now have the address of the Top Model house.
Howard: God bless you, Google Street View—registered trademark.
Leonard: Okay, for the record, what you guys are doing is really creepy.
Wolowitz: You know what? If it's creepy to use the Internet, military satellites, and robot aircraft to find a house full of gorgeous young models so that I can drop in on them unexpectedly, then fine, I'm creepy.
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0
Sheldon: The entire nation dedicated a decade of effort and treasure to put a man on the moon.
Wolowitz: Well, my fellow Americans, before this year is out we will put a Wolowitz on one of America's top models.
Raj: And a large number of people will believe it never happened
 • Rating: 4.5 / 5.0

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Total Quotes: 259
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