There are no bad ideas Lemon, only great ideas that go horribly wrong.

Kenneth's been out there for an hour telling cleaned-up Garrison Keillor stories.

Typical liberal media. That's why I get all my news from Dick Cheney's web site, DickViews.com.

For the first time in six months we beat all the Music Choice channels except of course, Latin Beats.

I coined the phrase "You wish, pal!"

[to Liz] You're like a swarthy, big-hipped Kelly Ripa.

My secret is, I'm in love with Liz Lemon.

Banks: NBC is the Titanic.
Jack: The highest grossing movie of all time?

[to Liz's offer of a hug] What is this, the Italian parliament. No, thank you?

Dot Com: You were a switch hitter?
Jack: Switch hitter, pitcher, catcher. Whatever the boys needed.

All you have to do as the writing staff of an NBC show is incorporate positive mentions, or 'POS-MENS' of GE products into your program. For example you could write an episode where one of your character purchases, and is satisfied with one of GE's direct current drilling motors for off-shore or land-based projects.

Jack: Lemon, I don't know how to do this.
Liz: I know.
Jack: I don't get it. It's not the fear. I thrive on fear.
Liz: Yeah, you're lookin' out a fake window right now, by the way.
Jack: I bow hunt polar bear. I once drove a rental car into the Hudson to practice escaping. And it's not the public speaking, there's just something about performing I can't wrap my brain around. All this creative crap. Acting. Ahhh. I've never been able to do it. Never.

30 Rock Quotes

Jack: Never go with a hippie to a second location.
Liz: I need to do that thing that rich people do where they turn money into more money. Can you teach me how to do that?
Jack: With my eyes closed.

Hey, nerds! Who's got two thumbs, speaks limited French, and hasn't cried once today? [pointing thumbs at self] This moi.

Liz