Ambition is the willingness to kill the things you love and eat them in order to stay alive. Haven't you ever read my throw pillow?

Jack: You are both a disgrace to the Donaghy name!
Jack's Dad: It's pronounced "Don-a-fee," you lace-curtain half-an-Englishman!
Jack: When I think of all the things that I've been holding inside me that I wanted to say to you... [raises fists] Well now I'm gonna let "Saint Patrick" and "Saint Michael" DO MY TALKING FOR ME!
Jack's Dad: [raises fists] You'll have to get through "Tip O'Neill" and "Bobby Sands" first!
Eddie Donaghy: You call those fist names?! [raises fists] Say hello to "Bono" and "Sandra Day O'Connor!"
Jack: Those are the stupidest fist names I've ever heard.

Liz: Oh, right, sorry, my mail has been piling up and I keep forgetting to buy toilet paper.
Jack: What is that supposed to mean?

Like a silver back gorilla or Mitt Romney's grandfather, I require more than one woman to...

I never sleep on planes. I don't wanna get "incepted."

With real estate there are no rules. It's like check-in at an Italian airport.

That's the sound of Honey Boo Boos piling up on your Tivo.

Do tv, and no one will ever take you seriously again.

Jack: Your evaluation gave me pause.
Pete: Are you sure? Those look like hands to me.

Jack [reading Kabletown]: Assatar? The Lovely Boners? The Hind Side? Fresh-Ass: Based on the Novel "Tush" by Assfire?

From now on you write and shoot the whole season in two weeks, like Wheel of Fortune or Fox News.

Lemon you just had a structural, analytic insight. Professor Widmer would've given you a good job spanking.

Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 384 in total

30 Rock Quotes

Ambition is the willingness to kill the things you love and eat them in order to stay alive. Haven't you ever read my throw pillow?

Jack

If you've just joined us, we're with Tracy Jordan, who is giving guitar icon Peter Frampton enigmatic clues about a secret treasure. Stay with us.

Larry King
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