...and then attended Harvard Business School where I was voted, Most. I once hit a stand up triple off Fidel Castro. I was the first person ever to say, I need a vacation from this vacation. The song "Your so vain" was in fact written...by me.

Liz: You comin' downstairs?
Jack: And stand outside in a crowd like some Italian? I don't think so.

Liz: The bathrooms are so much cleaner than at home... I don't know how they do it.
Jack: They clean them.

Jack: Lemon why do you keep spending so much money on Wigs?
Liz: Tracy's head size keeps changing.

The Harry Potter theme park is a huge hit with both anglophiles and pedophiles.

Jack: My naturally blonde lady love and I basked in the three S's: surf, sun and ...
Liz: Sandwiches?

You can't delude yourself into thinking you can combine them into one perfect woman, like a Smore you can take a shower with.

[to Nancy] I wanna take naps with you. I wanna watch you watching hockey. I wanna find long red strands of hair in my overcooked pot roast.

I've prepared a very unromantic evening. First we're going to see a documentary about female circumcision, and then we're going to eat too much Indian food.

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