Jack: Hey Lemon, check this out, I just made it up: the three B's: beers, boats, and buds. Doesn't that sound great?Liz: Are you having a stroke?
• Show: 30 Rock • Rating: 9.3 / 10 • Permalink
Jack: Show her the ugly duckling has turned into a vaguely ethnic swan.
• Show: 30 Rock • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Jack: Kenneth, how much money do you have in your savings?
Kenneth: Well, let's see. [looks in coffee can] Eighty thousand dollars!
Jack: If you don't include Confederate money?
Kenneth: Four thousand dollars!
• Show: 30 Rock • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Liz: No, listen to me. She's not fun, she's just crazy. Like, grab a cop's gun crazy.
Jack: Lemon, having known Claire for a very enjoyable 20 minutes and you for what feels like infinity. I'm going to go with Claire on this one.
• Show: 30 Rock • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Jack: What do you take to fly?
Liz: Candy and magazines.
Jack: No no. Pills. Nobody flies without medication anymore. Why shouldn't you enjoy the same luxuries as a dog?
Liz: Comanaprosil? May cause dizziness, sexual nightmares, and sleep crime.
Jack: It's very good.
• Show: 30 Rock • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Kenneth: I'm glad I'm not a white man, Mr. Donaghy... Is Spongebob Squarepants supposed to be terrifying?
Jack: You're darn right he is, Kenneth.
• Show: 30 Rock • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Kenneth: There's a whole channel on the cable that just tells you what's on the other channels!
Jack: I know, Kenneth. It's okay.
• Show: 30 Rock • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Liz: I got rid of all my Colin Firth movies in case they consider it erotica.
Jack: That man can wear a sweater.
• Show: 30 Rock • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
[water pours from ceiling]
Jack: The ceiling appears to be leaking.
Cooter: No, it's not. We looked into it and it's not.
• Show: 30 Rock • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Jack: I even stopped to catch a snowflake with my tongue, but apparently that's some signal in Chelsea.
• Show: 30 Rock • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Total Quotes: 191
