Sam: It's a power play. Naomi is trying to show that she has the power.
Pete: Why did Addison take the job anyway? Wasn't she a big shot in Seattle?
Violet: Is it just me or did Naomi just run over us with a steam roller.
Pete: Is she crazy?
Sam: Naomi's insane.
Pete: I mean Addison. Is she some kind of crazy person who gets kissed once, then decides to change her whole life?
Cooper: You kissed Addison? Really?
Violet: Focus!

Pete: What is that?
Cooper: Someone is getting happy.
Naomi: Mr. Wilson is giving a sperm deposit. Get away from the door.
Pete: That's a loud deposit.
Sam: Go Mr. Wilson!
Naomi: You guys are so immature these days.

I wanted to see you fight... just once!

SAM: "Hey...you want details, go see Naomi."
ADDISON: "She won't talk about it."
SAM: "Ah. Then you get no details."
ADDISON: "I'm on your side, you know that?"
SAM: "That's why you get no details."
ADDISON: "Details!"
SAM: "Woman, be quiet..."
ADDISON: "I even missed you."

ADDISON: "Did you cheat?"
SAM: "Two things I learned back in kindergarten. One, keep your hands to yourself. Two, he who smelt it, dealt it."
ADDISON: "That makes no sense."
SAM: "Yeah... well, you cheated... you cheated on your husband with his best friend. There. Smelt it, dealt it. It works."
ADDISON: "You're using fart logic!"

SAM: "Ow!"
ADDISON: "Idiot – you divorced Naomi?"
SAM: "Just mind your own business."
ADDISON: [slaps Sam again]
SAM: "Ouch!"
ADDISON: "Moron. She’s my best friend."
SAM: "Stop hitting me on top of my head."

[asked if a husband with sexual problems still likes sex] "He's a guy and he's not dead. I'm guessing yes."

JACKSON

"Never talk about your penis when you hug another man."

JACKSON
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