Community

Thursdays 8:00 PM on NBC
Community
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You're not worth the monologue.

Guys like you should be more scared, you trust-funded, body-spray, Eli Roth DVD-owner.

Repo man: Maybe you should have spent less money on special effects.
Jeff: Thanks a lot, Francis Ford Repo Man.

Britta: When's the graduation ceremony?
Jeff: Never. It's community college. You send in some papers and they stop charging you.

Well, it's official--it's on a banner.

Annie, why are you acting like a mistress in a Lifetime movie?

I've spent almost four years here, growing and changing and making dioramas.

Abed, we don't have origin stories, we have lives. At least...yup, just me.

Dean Pelton: Which is to say that having Jeffrey inside of me-
Jeff: No one was inside of anyone!
Dean Pelton: -was wrong. To have Jeffrey inside of me.

Shirley: Is this a bad time?
Dean Pelton (speaking as Jeff): I'm at Greendale, stuck in the body of a man who could be Gollum, so yeah, I'd say it's half past suck.

Maintenance Guy: Sorry, routine light switch check.
Jeff: That is not a thing!

Pierce: What do you want me to do?
Jeff: Stay alive...or don't!
Pierce: I'm on it!

Displaying quotes 13 - 24 of 246 in total

Community Quotes

Sensible night, appropriate night.
Snow on ground, left and right.
Round yon purchase of decorative things.
Tolerant rewrite of carols to sing.
Function with relative ease,
Function with relative ease.

Shirley [sung to the tune of "Silent Night"]

Britta don't make jokes, you're bad at it!

Annie