Jess Day Quotes
Nick: It's Schmidt we're talking about here. After we saw the movie "Titanic," he started the Billy Zane Fan Club.
Nick: Look it up. They're called Zane-iacs.
Jess: I have to show Nick...something in the bathroom.
Nick: It's tiles...I'm so bad at lying! It's for sex!
Nick: You know so many "Spaceballs" quotes.
Jess: They jammed the radar with literal jam!
Nick: I believe horses are from outer space--
Jess: I believe that, too!
Jess: Drinking to be cool, Nick? That's not a real thing.
Nick: That's the only thing in the world I know to be true.
Why are you talking to me like a James Taylor song?
Jess: Oh my god! I thought he was taking you to jail!
Nick: Naw, it's resort jail, and it's not so bad. They let me watch "Ugly Betty."
Jess: How many times a day does Schmidt text you?
Nick: Oh, no, just like...40.
Jess: What's next? What do we do?
Nick: I'm really fighting the urge to buy you a lobster dinner.
I don't think the badger's actually rabid, I think he's just kind of a dick.
Burquas isn't you guys, is it?
Life's messy. It kicks you in the ass. That's right, I said ass.