New Girl

Tuesdays 9:00 PM on FOX
New girl

Nick: I believe horses are from outer space--
Jess: I believe that, too!

Jess: Drinking to be cool, Nick? That's not a real thing.
Nick: That's the only thing in the world I know to be true.

Why are you talking to me like a James Taylor song?

Jess: Oh my god! I thought he was taking you to jail!
Nick: Naw, it's resort jail, and it's not so bad. They let me watch "Ugly Betty."

Jess: How many times a day does Schmidt text you?
Nick: Oh, no, just like...40.

Jess: What's next? What do we do?
Nick: I'm really fighting the urge to buy you a lobster dinner.

I don't think the badger's actually rabid, I think he's just kind of a dick.

Burquas isn't you guys, is it?

Life's messy. It kicks you in the ass. That's right, I said ass.

Jess: The only anti-depressant you need is in my pants!
Guy: It's really a medical issue.

So, would you like to freak?

You question my pajamas? You make me question our entire friendship!

Displaying quotes 37 - 48 of 115 in total

New Girl Quotes

It's a sexy place Jess, look at the CPR poster.

Coach

I'm not convinced I know how to read, I've just memorized a lot of words.

Nick
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