Phoebe: Well, it was just... it was all so crazy, you know? I mean, Chandler was in the closet counting to 10, and he was up to 7, and I hadn't found a place to hide yet. I meant to tell you, and I wrote it all down on my hand. See? All of it.
Joey: Yep, that's my audition.
Monica: See? Now this is why I keep notepads everywhere.
Phoebe: Yep, and that's why we don't invite you to play.

Face your fear. You have a fear of heights, you go to the top of the building. You're afraid of bugs, get a bug.

Monica: I gotta go to work. Has anybody seen my left boob?
Joey: I love that movie.
(Grabs boob from under Joey's head)
Monica: Here it is. Joey, what are you doing?
Joey: I'm sorry, it just felt nice.

Joey: Oh yeah. Go for it, man, jump off the high dive, stare down the barrel of the gun, pee into the wind!
Chandler: Yeah, Joe. I assure you if I'm ever staring down the barrel of a gun, I'm pretty much gonna be peeing every which way.

Rachel: (About the sling on Joey's arm) Did you tell the doctor you did it jumping up and down on your bed?
Joey: No. I had a whole cover story, but Chandler here sold me out.
Chandler: Well, I'm sorry Joe, I didn't think the doctor would buy that it just fell out of the socket.

Chandler: Okay Joe, I gotta ask. The hot girl from the xerox place buck naked (He gestures with his one hand), or a big tub of jam (He gestures with his other hand)?
Joey: Put your hands together.

Joey: Remember when your mom would send you to the movies with a jar of jam and a spoon?
Rachel: (Pats Joey on the head) You're so pretty.

Ah, this guy's an astronaut, that would have been so cool! (Monica looks at Joey) For like a day.

Monica: (Looking at potential sperm donors) Look at this guy! He's from Queens, 27, an actor. From a big family, 7 girls and he's the only... (Looks at Joey) ...boy. Oh my God, under Personal Comments, "New York Knicks rule."
Joey: Yeah, the Knicks rule!

Monica: I think, that if you really like this guy, you should just trust him.
Phoebe: Thank you, Monica.
Joey: Orrr, you could follow him and see where he goes.
Monica: Oh, that's what I would do, forget mine.

Joey: Oh, Jam? I love jam! Hey, how come we never have jam at our place?
Chandler: Because the kids need new shoes.

Ross: Joey, why can't you just wear the underwear you're wearing now?
Joey: Cause I'm not wearing any underwear now.
Ross: Um, okay ... then, why do you have to wear underwear tonight?
Joey: Cause it's a rented tux, okay? I'm not gonna go commando in another man's fatigues!

Friends Quotes

Ross: I get home, and I see Julie's saline solution on my night table. And I'm thinking to myself, "Oh my God, what the hell am I doing?" I mean, here I am, I am with Julie, this incredible, great woman, who I care about and who cares about me, and I'm like, what, am I just gonna throw all that away?
Joey: You got all that from saline solution?

Phoebe: (About Ross bringing luggage) How long did you think this barbecue was gonna last?
Ross: I'm going to China.
Phoebe: Jeez, you say one thing, and...
Monica: You're going to China?
Ross: (Not wanting to get into it) It's for the museum. Someone found a bone. We want the bone. They don't want us to have the bone. I'm going to try to persuade them to give us the bone. It's a whole big bone thing.