Cougar Town
Tuesdays 10:00 PM on TBSPopular Jules Cobb Quotes
Ellie: You know how I take a nap every day from 10 to 11:45?
Jules: Your life is better than mine
Travis: Good bye, I love you dad
Jules: Oh my god, did he just say I love you?
Bobby: I know, pretty gay right?
Ellie: Why are you out of breath
Jules: Cause I'm sanding down my disgusting elephant heels. With all the shavings here I could make a second foot
Jules: Oh look who got laid last night
Andy: That's right chumps, missionary accomplished!
Jules: I can't believe I was married to a guy who keeps his driver's license in a box
Bobby: A box marked important stuff
Jules: Are you watching my sex tape?
Ellie: Yeah, but with the volume off so it's not so weird
I have so many chin whiskers I look like carnie folk
Laurie [about Ellie]: She's hot for a frigid, beastly, elderly woman
Ellie: You think I'm hot
Jules: That worked?
Ellie: Well yeah because if that trashy big lipped slag said it, it might be a little true
Laurie: You think I have big lips? That's really sweet
Travis: Hey mom look what Donny drew. He mostly draws snakes doing horrible things to women, though this one looks consensual
Jules: She does't look happy, Travis
Ellie: If you don't stop with the hazelnut, I'm gonna make my own coffee
Jules: No you won't
Elie: You're right, even saying it was too much work
Jules [with her shirt up]: Hey Trav!
Travis: Shirt down, then hey Trav
Jules [pulls down shirt]: Hey Trav!
Travis: Too, late scarred for life
Jules: These used to feed you!
Jules: When a 40-something guy gets divorced, it's always: "Way to go, Tiger!"
Grayson: We don't call each other Tiger. It's always Champ, or Samurai.
