Wednesdays 10:00 PM on Comedy Central
South-park

Mrs. McCormick: Yes, Kenny such a great name, my little Kenny, a brand new Kenny.
Mr. McCormick: God, this must be the fiftieth time this has happened.
Mrs. McCormick: Fifty-second.

Stan: Wow Kenny, your mom's pregnant, what are you going to do now?
Kenny: I don't know, but I gotta think of something.

(after Kenny hits his dad intentionally with a baseball)
Mrs. McCormick: What happened?
Mr. McCormick: He smacked me in the balls!

(Kenny is holding a plunger above his head and staring angrily at his mother)
Mrs. McCormick: Oh, hi Kenny. What are you doing?
(Camera pans back to angry plunger-holding Kenny)
Mrs. McCormick: Wh-What are you doin' Kenny?
(Camera pan)
Mrs. McCormick: Kenny..What are you goin' to plunge?

Stan: Dude, this isn't working.
Kyle: It's Kenny's singing!
Cartman: Yeah, Kenny, you have to sing better!
Kenny: (I'm singing as good as I can!)
Stan: Well, it's not good enough, Kenny! You have to get better! Try it again!
Grandpa: Aha, I knew it. They turned you into poofders.

Chef: Well look at you cute little crackers with your money and your fancy clothes and your cell phones. It's almost like you wereOh my God! Children, what have I told you about drugs?
Stan, Kyle, Cartman, and Kenny: There's a time and a place for everything and it's called college.

What the hell? What the f--k is this?
(Mumbling as two more speeders fly by and bomb him to bits; then the rats converge on him.)

Sheila Brovflofski: Kyle and Ike, be safe, and Kenny, try to act Jewish.
Kenny: (muffled) How do you do that?

Kyle: Mom? Can Kenny go to Jewbilee with me?
Sheila: Uh well, Kyle, Jewbilee is sort of a special thing.
Kyle: Oh. Kenny isn't special?
Kenny: (Aw.)
Sheila: No, no, you're very special, Kenny. It's just that well, Jewbilee is for Jewish kids.
Gerald: You see boys, Jew Scouts is a special group that borrows a little bit from all different Jewish denominations. From the Orthodox Jews, from the Hasidic Jews, from the Northern Italy Cave Jews But you have to believe the basic tenets of Judaism to be a Scout.
Kyle: Kenny'll believe whatever you want him to.
Kenny: (Yeah.)

Displaying quotes 19 - 27 of 48 in total