Kristina Braverman Quotes
You know what? You are 100% right. I almost died. But I didn't. That's exactly why I am doing this.
Heather: Alright. We've got some work to do, you're a little rusty, but that's what I want to see more of - more Kristina.
Kristina: I haven't really made my decision...
Heather: You know what? We've gotta, like, write an announcement speech, so I'm gonna get some coffee. You want anything?
Kristina: I.. sure. Are you hired?
Heather: I'm just gonna take the job, because you don't have time for more interviews. We have this announcement speech to write.
Kristina: Honey, how old were you when you got your first boner?
Kristina: You know, stiffy, hard on, chubby, whatever...how old were you when you first got wood?
Adam: What the hell? Is it even six o'clock yet?
Honey, you're so awesome. I'm sorry I'm such a tease. You got all oiled up and you have you're Merv Griffin jacket.
If you'll have me, I would like to go out on a date with you.
Adam: What about Max?
Kristina: Max thinks it's cool. He thinks I look like Bane from the Batman movie.
Mark is so cute, but he's like a puppy. Hank is a man!
Honey, there's a file on my computer, that I made for the kids. I want to make sure the kids have it. Can you make sure of that?
Well, to be honest. We bribe 'em. If I were on Oprah, I'd be like, "it's the incentive system," but really it's just bribery.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm smoking pot. I was just dopin' it up and I'm really sorry.
Adam: I'm sure he's going to be fine, honey. Crosby said he was going to 'totes' handle it.
Kristina: I don't know what that means, 'totes' handle it.
Kirstina: I need my personal space, Haddie. I'm totally fine.
Haddie: I'm here to help you, mom, and I need you to give me something to do.
Kristina: Give your dad a hug.