South Park

Wednesdays 10:00 PM on Comedy Central
South park
TV Fanatic Works Better with Prime Instant Video
40,000 other titles are available to watch now.

Kyle: Those contorting Romanian chicks rule.
Cartman: Yeah, especially that second one from the left. She was fine!
Kyle: Cartman, what the hell are you talking about?! They're identical!
Cartman: Not that second one from the left, she had it goin' on!

Stan: Oh my goodness, you killed Kenny.
Kyle: (indifferently) Bastard.

(After taking the Ritalin antidote)
Stan: Wait a minute! Phil Collins sucks ass!
Kyle: Yeah! what the hell were we thinking? Boooooo!

Cartman: You know what you guys: we should go to the concert anyways, and see Phil Collins.
Kyle: Yeah, I think Phil Collins rocks the house.

Sheila: Kyle was always running around, screaming, like he was a little eight-year-old.
Kyle: But I am eight.

Stan: Oh my God, we killed Kenny.
Kyle: We killed Kenny?
Stan: Yep, we killed Kenny. We're bastards.

Kyle: We won! We won!
Butters: Yeah. Why we sure gave those skanky bitches what for.

Clyde: I'm not fat you guys, I'm just kinda big boned.
Kyle: That's what they all say!

Cartman: Hey you guys.
Kyle: Hey, fatass. How's prison?
Cartman: Well, it sucks balls. Whattaya think?
Stan: Cartman, why the hell did you have to commit a hate crime?! We're gonna lose to girls because of you!
Kyle: Yeah! So you gotta bust out of here. So, we made you this cake. There's an ail-nay ile-fay inside of it.
Cartman: What's that?
Kyle: Listen, aggot-fay. An ail-nay ile-fay so you can eak-bray out of ison-pray.
Stan: Yeah, you stupid umbass-day!
Cartman: I'd love to eat a cake, you guys, but they don't let us take anything back to the cells from here.
Kyle: They on't-day?! Why the ell-hay ot-nay?! It ook-tay our-fay ours-hay to ake-bay this oddamned-gay ake-cay, and ow-nay we're otally-tay ewed-scray!

Kyle: We won again!
Token: That's not fair! Cartman's ass is so fat, he makes your sled go faster!
Cartman: Hey! Don't call me fat, Token!

Token's dad: You boys have to go explain to the govenor why we should disban hate crime laws.
Kyle: Why can't you do it?
Token's dad: Because he won't listen to me.
Stan: Why not?
Token's dad: Because I'm black.

Kyle: What about Dan Rather? Do you think he's real?
Cartman: No, man, that's just a TV show.

Displaying quotes 121 - 132 of 322 in total

South Park Quotes

It's a man's obligation to stick his boneration in a woman's separation, this sort of penetration will increase the population of the younger generation.

</i> Cartman

James Cameron doesn't do what James Cameron does for James Cameron. James Cameron does what James Cameron does because James Cameron is James Cameron!

James Cameron