Malory: Duly noted and disregarded. And I expect you to be totally convincing.
Lana: As the damsel in distress? Have you ever met a woman less damselly?
Malory: Pam.

Cheryl: Think about someone else for once in your life.
Lana: And that's her saying that.

With your looks, maybe bitchy isn't the way to go.

Krieger: I needed help disseminating him.
Cheryl: Eww!
Pam: Not what it means.
Lana: Still pretty gross though.

Lana: Someone is trying to frame Malory for assassinating the prime minister of Italy.
Cheryl: Ooh I bet it's that wicked king.

Lana: How much did Dodge kick in?
Malory: Not as much as you'd think.

Archer: I got to blow up a train.
Lana: Thanks, Gomez.
Archer: Nice.

Lana: Please tell me that's a smoke grenade.
Archer: Okay. it's not though.

Malory: Have the porter bring me a cobb salad.
Lana: Before or after we capture the dangerous terrorist?
Malory: Before.

Lana: You're looking for Predator aren't you? A, he's invisible.
Archer: Not totally, he has a tall tell shimmer.

Lana: Don't take this the wrong way, but i'm trying to figure out how you're going to be an effective field agent.
Ray: Interesting coming from a woman.

Noah: How much of my blood does he need?
Lana: I dunno, 10 gils?

Archer Quotes

Cheryl: What the stupid shit are you doing??
Cyril: You said you wanted watermelon.
Cheryl: Watermelon's red?
Cyril: Yes. How do you not know that?
Cheryl: Who am I? Charles Frederick Andress?

Hawley: Awww screw me!
Archer: ...said Ripley to the android Bishop.