Cougar Town
Tuesdays 10:00 PM on TBSLaurie Keller Quotes
No one who says "coolie" is cool. That's why Coolio is named Coolio.
Ellie: It's for the lady who likes to lounge by the pool, but also get paid for sex.
Laurie: You can do that? Is that a job?
Laurie: I'm gonna say something now that Meredith Baxter Birney has said in every TV movie I have ever seen: "I...will not give up on that boy."
Laurie: What is with the stomach kissing?
Jules: He's trying to jumpstart my uterus!
Laurie: Did you just one night standed by your own son?
Jules: He said we were going to brunch.
Laurie: Oh no.
I don't know exactly what your race is, but I am into it in a big way.
If someone was up on my man like that. I would lace up my ass kicking boots.
Ellie: If I get murdered I need you to tell the police something.
Laurie: Seriously, if I had a dime.
Ellie: You know if they just wanted to see some dumb, townie ho floppin' her ta-tas all they need to do is stay here and give ten dollars to-
Laurie: Yeah, yeah, yeah I know where you're goin' with this.
Ellie: Let me finish. You.
Ellie: Eat your chips, Jellybean.
Laurie: I don't wanna.
Ellie. Play with the bag.
When Smith dumped me. It literally took me months to get back to a place where I could sleep with random dudes to feel good about myself.
Laurie: Wait, why do we have to have coffee over here?
Jules: 'Cause wherever I am is where we have coffee.
Ellie: But this is horrible.
