(pretending to be Ellie) Jules, I can say you look beautiful, because you're the only one I'm nice to.

Chick: Ding a ling a ling...
Jules: That's my cue since I was four. I had to use both my hands.
Laurie: Awe how cute.

Why? Why won't he love me.

Smith: Wow! That was like writing a mechanic bull.
Laurie: We should break up more often.

I can be friends with my ex.

Oh hell no! Smith you are a dead man.

Grayson, you're right. it's time to eat the sword.

I'm in love and it's the real deal, like keep the baby type of love. I even breathe his name. See Smith...

Laurie: Hey hot flash, did you do that? (It says FAKE on her purse)
Ellie: Yes, I did. See the reason why I buy expensive things is to belittle people who cant afford them.

Go see him, dork university is like almost twenty minutes away.

Jules! Slap out of it.

Laurie: Okay I'm lost inside my brain again...
Ellie: Oh jelly bean.
Laurie: Drinking games! I love drinking games!

Cougar Town Quotes

Jules: Wine in the morning on the weekends. Lets all think about it people.
Bobby: Think about what?
Grayson: Morning drinking.

Jules: It's time to suck up!
Ellie: That's for boys.
Jules: It's time to uterus up!