Sheldon: I have spent years turning this lump of clay into an acceptable conduit for my will, and then you came along and reshaped him, with your newfangled ideas and your fancy genitals.
Penny: Are you gonna let him talk to me like this?
Leonard: "Fancy" sounds like a compliment.

Penny: Translation?
Leonard: Waah. I don't want a table!

Leonard: In fact, if you want, we can do it right here on Sheldon's spot.
Penny: That is the least sexy thing anyone's ever said to me.

Leonard: Plus, I'm not sure it's a great idea to take Penny to where wine comes from. [chuckles] What? It's a joke. Oh, come on. We bust on each other. I wear dorky glasses, you might have a problem -- it's all for laughs.
Penny: That would really piss me off if I didn't have a buzz going on.

Leonard: I say this one time instead of wimping out, let's be badasses!
Raj: Okay, I'll be a badass -- but only if you pinkie swear to be one, too.

Raj: So that's it. Everything's sold out?
Leonard: Yeah.
Howard: I can't believe we're not going.
Sheldon: It's okay. You know, there-there's always WonderCon in Annheim, you know? That-That's just as good. ... Excuse me. [Cries]

Raj: Anyone in?
All the Guys: No!
Sheldon: Do not stop refreshing your screens!
All the Guys: Refresh. Refresh. Refresh....
Penny: Yeah, this is not gonna be enough coffee.

Leonard: Look, if you want to break up, just say it.
Penny: Leonard....
Leonard: No, no, no, I take it back, don't say it. Just hate me but stay with me. It worked for my parents.
Penny: Listen. I don't want to break up with you.

Leonard: Can we please have some privacy?
Sheldon: No. I'm as much a part of this relationship as you two. And I think it's high time we put all our cards on the table. For example, where is this going? Are you two ever getting married? And if so, where will we all live? Have you thought about that?

Leonard: Listen. I could never do what you're doing. I'd be terrified.
Penny: Well it's scary for me too.
Sheldon: I'm fine with it.
Leonard: My point is: just because I couldn't do it doesn't mean you shouldn't. And I'm proud of you.
Penny: Okay. Thank you.

Penny: Let's get married?
Leonard: What?
Penny: Leonard Hofstadter, will you marry me?
Leonard: Um....
Penny: Did you seriously just say "Umm..."?

Leonard: Can we talk?
Penny: We can, but the part of "Penny" might get cut.

TBBT Quotes

Penny: Hey, Sheldon, did you change your Wi-Fi password again?
Sheldon: Yes, it's "Penny, get your own Wi-Fi." No spaces.

Sheldon: Why do you have the Chinese character for "soup" tattooed on your right buttock?
Penny: It's not "soup," it's "courage."
Sheldon: No it isn't. But I suppose it does take courage to demonstrate that kind of commitment to soup.
Penny: How'd you see it? You said you wouldn't look.
Sheldon: Sorry. As I told you, the hero always peeks.