How did Cinderella finish her dress so fast? Birds and squirrels, yeah that's not gonna work.

Leslie: Ron, I'm going to need you to walk me down the aisle.
Ron: It would be an honor. And the first time I won't regret walking down the aisle.

Leslie: But my mom isn't here. And you parents aren't here.
Ben: Good!

No one achieves anything alone.

Oh, no! Pawnee has been hit with a Tornado Quake!

Leslie: It is with a heavy heart that I say: we have been Jammed.

Well, this simulated disaster is a total disaster.

Damnit, Jamm. I should have had animal control kill you.

If I told you to jump off a bridge, would you do it? I hope so! Because the only way that this gala is going to happen is if you do everything I say.

My God. I have driven Ann right into the belly of the douche.

Ann: This guy went to Harvard.
Leslie: So did the Unabomber!

You are so brilliant and kind and stupid-hot!

Parks & Rec Quotes

Andy: There's an old saying in show business: The show must go wrong. Everything always goes wrong, and you just have to deal with it.

Time is money, money is power, power is pizza, and pizza is knowledge, let’s go!

April