Ron: Take this compass. All great adventurers need one.
Leslie: As far as all this firing stuff goes...I will not forget and I will never forgive you.

What did you put in this sugar? It's so good!

We're overrun with raccoons and obese toddlers.

Leslie: It is nice to see you again.
Ben: Are you talking to my butt?
Leslie: Yes.

Ben: Where did you get a Washington Monument figurine at midnight on a Tuesday?
Leslie: From my office - I have like 50 of them.

Ben: Why are you laughing?
Leslie: Because my dream is dead.

Your ambiguous ethnic blend perfectly represents the dream of
the American melting pot.

We brought a sorry for your loss fruit basket for Bobby. And
it is very classy -- no melons and no apples.

My official statement is that is, overall, a bummer.

I was in favor of closing the Borders bookstore, not the border to Mexico.

Nothing gets me more amped than Sarah Machlachlan.

Jennifer: I swear the air in this town is killing my brain cells."
Leslie: The water isn't good for you either, you shouldn't drink the tap water.

Parks & Rec Quotes

Time is money, money is power, power is pizza, and pizza is knowledge, let’s go!

April

Andy: From now on, we will be using code names. You can address me as
Eagle One. Ann, code name -- Been There, Don That. April is --
Currently Doing That. Donna is -- It Happened Once in a Dream; Chris,
code name -- If I Had To Pick a Dude. Ben is -- Eagle Two.
Ben: Oh thank God.