Leslie: Can you get five eagles? No, get 10 eagles!
Mark: Leslie-
Leslie: No, you're right. It's your life. Give her as many eagles as you want.

Horseback. You should ask her on horseback. No, you should ask her in a hot air balloon. No, she should be on a hot air balloon and you should ride up on horseback. Oh, wait. She's in the balloon; you ride up on horseback. You point to the sky. Up there, skywriting. Marry me, Ann.

And it's important because Pawnee is the fourth fattest town in the U.S. It goes us, Dallas, Tulsa and certain parts of the Mall of America.

I know you're probably thinking, "There's that crazy gate lady from outside back again." And to some extent, you're right. I am the gate lady. But the only thing I'm crazy about is leaving the past behind.

Well nothing's bruised but my ego. And my arm, a little, from the mechanized gate.

Leslie: I need you to get this word for word.
Shauna: It's a tape recorder, so it will.
Leslie: Gazebo. More like gazoinks-bo. She may be a former beauty queen, but today she's the king of destroying history.
Shauna: OK, could you just maybe talk normally?
Leslie: OK fine. Gazoinks-bo. Jessica Wicks is throwing a birthday party for her husband, Nick Newport Sr. at the Turnbill Mansion tonight.

A hundred and fifty years ago an interracial couple was married here and then slaughtered by their own families. It's one of the most beautiful stories in Pawnee's history. Why are you trying to destroy it?

History is important. You just can't go around changing everything all the time. Or else next thing you know they'll be painting the White House not white. I'm so angry I can't think of another color. [pause] Green.

Jessica: Where I come from, there's a saying: "What's done is done."
Leslie: That's a saying everywhere.
Tom: I've never heard it before and I think it's a great saying.

Jessica: Hi, I'm Jessica Wicks, Miss Pawnee 1994.
Leslie: Hello, yes, we've met before. We were both judges at the pageant last year.
Jessica: Leslie Norp, of course. How are you?

Leslie: Thanks for the coffee.
Ann: That's also for Mark.
Leslie: I really need it though. But next time more sugar, OK? Thanks, bye!

I'm sorry, Ron. As much as I would like to go for the all-time city hall single-day meetings record, there is an emergency. Someone is trying to alter a gazebo.

Parks & Rec Quotes

Leslie: I know you're not gay.
Tom: No, I'm not.
Leslie: But you're effeminate.
Tom: What?
Leslie: Well, you're wearing a peach shirt with a coiled snake on it.
Tom: That's because it was featured in Details magazine, and it's awesome.

Look, Tammy and I don't work. We are oil and water. Or oil and TNT and C4 and a detonator and a butane torch.

Ron