And it's important because Pawnee is the fourth fattest town in the U.S. It goes us, Dallas, Tulsa and certain parts of the Mall of America.

I know you're probably thinking, "There's that crazy gate lady from outside back again." And to some extent, you're right. I am the gate lady. But the only thing I'm crazy about is leaving the past behind.

Well nothing's bruised but my ego. And my arm, a little, from the mechanized gate.

Leslie: I need you to get this word for word.
Shauna: It's a tape recorder, so it will.
Leslie: Gazebo. More like gazoinks-bo. She may be a former beauty queen, but today she's the king of destroying history.
Shauna: OK, could you just maybe talk normally?
Leslie: OK fine. Gazoinks-bo. Jessica Wicks is throwing a birthday party for her husband, Nick Newport Sr. at the Turnbill Mansion tonight.

A hundred and fifty years ago an interracial couple was married here and then slaughtered by their own families. It's one of the most beautiful stories in Pawnee's history. Why are you trying to destroy it?

History is important. You just can't go around changing everything all the time. Or else next thing you know they'll be painting the White House not white. I'm so angry I can't think of another color. [pause] Green.

Jessica: Where I come from, there's a saying: "What's done is done."
Leslie: That's a saying everywhere.
Tom: I've never heard it before and I think it's a great saying.

Jessica: Hi, I'm Jessica Wicks, Miss Pawnee 1994.
Leslie: Hello, yes, we've met before. We were both judges at the pageant last year.
Jessica: Leslie Norp, of course. How are you?

Leslie: Thanks for the coffee.
Ann: That's also for Mark.
Leslie: I really need it though. But next time more sugar, OK? Thanks, bye!

I'm sorry, Ron. As much as I would like to go for the all-time city hall single-day meetings record, there is an emergency. Someone is trying to alter a gazebo.

In 1867, the progressive Rev. Turnbill officiated a wedding between a white woman and a Wamapoke Indian chief. The secret ceremony was beautiful and romantic. But then word got out and the reception was a bloodbath. Fortunately there were two survivors. Unfortunately they were both horses.

Leslie: OK, so I have everything I need, right? I have a fresh cup of coffee, comfy fur-lined boots.
Tom: I'm going to need those boots back by the end of the day.
Leslie: Yeah, no problem. They're actually a little narrow for me.

Parks & Rec Quotes

Time is money, money is power, power is pizza, and pizza is knowledge, let’s go!

April

Andy: From now on, we will be using code names. You can address me as
Eagle One. Ann, code name -- Been There, Don That. April is --
Currently Doing That. Donna is -- It Happened Once in a Dream; Chris,
code name -- If I Had To Pick a Dude. Ben is -- Eagle Two.
Ben: Oh thank God.