Parks and Recreation

Leslie Knope Quotes (Page 39)

Leslie: Ron's ex-wife? That's terrific. Or is that awful? I mean he hates her, but he knows her. Everything's OK, or is it just the same?
Tom: Leslie, you're thinking out loud again.
Leslie: Am I? I am.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Leslie: The library is the worst group of people ever assembled in history. They're mean, conniving, rude and extremely well read, which makes them very dangerous.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Leslie: Pawnee's library department is the most diabolical ruthless bunch of bureaucrats I've ever seen. They're like a biker gang. But instead of shotguns and crystal meth, they use political savvy... and shushing.

 • Rating: Unrated

Leslie: April, stop that. Who are you texting?
April: You.
Leslie: Aww, she's texting me... I'm sorry you're bored.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Leslie: Hey, you're going to jail for a very long time.
Dave: He's not going to go to jail, you know. He's a minor.
Leslie: Well, we'll let the jury decide.
Dave: There's not gonna be a jury. It's a....
Leslie: Then the judge will decide where he goes.
Dave: Look, he's going to do probation. He's a minor.
Leslie: Dave, just let me have this?
 • Rating: Unrated

Leslie: I believe that you're innocent until proven guilty in this country. That's the cornerstone of democracy.
Andy: Sure.
Leslie: On the other hand. Greg Pikitis is a little punk. And I kind of want to TP his house.
 • Rating: Unrated

Greg's Fake Mom: Do you have any evidence?
Leslie: Yes. Two words. Peach pit. His DNA is all over it I assume.
Dave: We don't know that.
Leslie: We can get it tested....
Dave: We can't.
Leslie: And if it matches your DNA than you're going away for a long time.
 • Rating: Unrated

Leslie: You talk to him first. You have a scary face.
Dave: Hey!
Leslie: No, in a good way. Scary cute.
 • Rating: Unrated

Leslie [about a peach pit]: This is his ace of spades. This is his calling card. This is what he leaves all his victims. And it's still warm. OK, go arrest him and send this to the lab.
Dave: We don't have a lab.
 • Rating: Unrated

Leslie: Suspect laughing with friends, and playing with his stupid skateboard in a snide, turdish manner.
Dave: Turdish?
Leslie: Yes. Like a turd. Like a little turd.
 • Rating: Unrated

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