Lily Aldrin Quotes (Page 12)
Season 3, Episode 10: "The Yips"
Robin [wearing no makeup at the gym]: Shut up. Lily, tell him to shut up.
Lily: I'm sorry, lesbian prison guard. Do we know each other?
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Robin: Wow. That makes me want to join a gym. So I can get super strong and punch you really hard in the face.
Ted: Yes, we should all do it.
Lily: Yeah. Let's all punch Barney in the face.
• Rating: Unrated
Season 3, Episode 9: "Slapsgiving"
Lily: Well guys, have fun.
Ted: Woah, this is gonna be a major cleanup.
Everyone [saluting]: Major Cleanup!
Marshall: Oh man, we're gonna be doing this all the time now, aren't we?
Robin: That's the general idea.
Everyone [saluting]: General Idea!
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 3, Episode 8: "Spoiler Alert"
Marshall: [looking for his password] Jelly beans, fluffernutter, gummi bears, ginger snaps- this is a grocery list.
Robin: For who, a witch building a house in the forest?
Marshall: Sugar helps me study.
Barney: This is the kind of shopping a ten-year-old does when he's alone for the weekend.
Lily: Who leaves a 10 year old alone for the weekend?
Barney: And your mom was perfect.
• Rating: Unrated
Season 3, Episode 7: "Dowisetrepla"
Robin: What the hell are you doing? You can't buy this place. Lily, you have a debt the size of Mount Waddington.
Lily: Waddington?
Robin: It's the tallest mountain in Canada. It's like 4000 metres high.
Lily: Meters?
• Rating: Unrated
Lily: Hi. My name is Lily, and I'm a shopaholic.
Robin: Hi, Lily. Oh, you guys don't do that here? Sorry. Proceed.
Lily: I buy designer clothes and accesories that I can't afford. I have fifteen credit cards and they're all maxed out. And nobody outside this room, not even my husband, knows and I feel terrible because all I want to do right now is ask you where you got those shoes, they're adorable!
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Marshall: Ted, how many times have I told you to put the lid back on the peanut butter jar?! It's this inconsiderate, immature jackassry that makes me feel like I'm living in The Real World House! And not the early days when they all had jobs and social consciences, I'm talking about Hawaii, and after! I can't take it anymore! Ted, Lily and I are married now! It's time! We're getting our own place!
Lily:... Actually, I left the lid off, sorry, baby
• Rating: Unrated
Season 3, Episode 4: "Little Boys"
Lily: Dumped by a six-year-old.
Robin: Whatever, he's a stupid-head
• Rating: Unrated
Robin: What's my "but"? You know, I'm really nice, but...
Ted (voiceover): But she's afraid of commitment.
Lily (voiceover): But she's a gun nut.
Barney (voiceover): But she's... Canadian.
Marshall (voiceover): But she doesn't like Field of Dreams.
All: I can't think of anything.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 3, Episode 3: "Third Wheel"
Marshall: Okay, new scenario: We're caught in a car crash, you die, I'm left paralyzed. Two sexy nurses come in with a 6-pack of wine coolers. I try to blink at them in Morse code [bats eyes] Please... no... I love my dead wife. But they're medical professionals and I have to assume this is good for me.
Lily: Fine, sleep with your nurses. Tonight you ride the unicycle.
Marshall [muttering]: Already did this morning
• Rating: Unrated
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Total Quotes: 243
