Lily [to Robin about Barney]: You're going to break his... you're going to break whatever it is that pumps that black sludge through his veins• Show: How I Met Your Mother • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Marshall: Lily, when Evel Knievel sat his stride to star spangled rocket to the on the rim of Snake River Canon, do you think his wife said get down from there?
Lily: For the last time I am not Linda Knievel. I will never be Linda Knievel
Marshall: You don't need to remind me
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Lily: At tomorrow's game, if you're anything less than a teddybear stuffed with cotton-candy and rainbows, I will silent-treatment your ass into the ground. You will think the time I found your Internet search history was a picnic
• Show: How I Met Your Mother • Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Student: What's the score?
Lily: It's all tied up at fun-to-fun
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Marshall: If I could nail any celebrity, it'd be Lily. She's the star of my heart.
Lily: For me, it would be Hugh Jackman
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Ted: I just got screwed by my two best friends and I didn't even know it
Lily: In Canada that's called a sneaky snowflake
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Ted: I never said I was gonna get back together with her. But I was thinking, she's new in town, would it be the worst thing in the world if I gave her a call?
Marshall: No, no, Ted, it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. It would be the fourth worst thing. Number one, supervolcano. Number two, an asteroid hits the earth. Number three, all footage of Evil Knievel is lost. Number four, Ted calls Karen. Number five, Lily gets eaten by a shark.
Lily: I'm Lily and I approve the order of that list.
• Show: How I Met Your Mother • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Lily [to Marshall]: Hey you want to go do it in Barney's childhood bed again?
Barney: My race car bed?
Marshall: It handles great buddy
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Lily: Doctor X, you're still bragging about Doctor X?
Robin: Who's Doctor X?
Ted: Nobody knows. He was this genious mystery DJ.
Marshall: It was Ted.
Ted: His identity remains a mystery to this day.
Lily: It was Ted.
Ted: But this phantom of the airwaves changed the very face of college radio.
Marshall: It was Ted.
Lily: And your show sucked
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Ted: Hey, how was your day?
Lily: Today I yelled at a little girl for painting a rainbow.
Ted: A rainbow?! Sounds like that bitch had it coming
• Show: How I Met Your Mother • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Total Quotes: 176
