The Simpsons
Sundays 8:00 PM on FOXPopular Lisa Simpson Quotes
Lisa: You're all forgetting the most important thing! Which is that it's wrong to imprison an animal!
Homer: Lisa, go to your room.
Bret: She can't hear us. We're stage whispering.
Lisa: I can hear you.
Jermaine: No you can't!
Lisa: Grampa, how did you take off your underwear without taking off your pants?
Grampa: I don't know!
Lisa: No toupees.
Homer: Whaaat, I'm going for the Shia LaBeouf thing. Not quite a nerd, not quite a hunk. Shia LaBeouf!
Lisa: I propose to you that your heir not need be a boy. In this phallocentric society of ours--
Mr. Burns: I don't know what phallocentric means, but no girls!
Milhouse: (dressed as a girl) So much for Plan B.
(After realizing he is going to lose the election, Mr. Burns starts smashing things in the Simpson home)
Mr. Burns: Smithers, tip over this table for me!
Smithers: Yes, sir.
(Smithers grunts as he turns over the table.)
Marge: Homer. Homer. Make them stop.
Homer: (Clears throat) Uh, Mr. Burns. Um, Mr. Burns?
Mr. Burns: Shut up and wreck something!
(Homer picks up a flower vase and drops it.)
Lisa: Mr. Burns, I hardly see what destroying our meager possessions is going to accomplish.
Mr. Burns: She's right. Take me home, Smithers. We'll destroy something tasteful.
(writing home) Dear Mom and Dad, I no longer fear hell, because I've been to Kamp Krusty.
Bart: Ya know, Grampa kinda smells like that trunk in the garage where the bottom's all wet.
Lisa: Nuh-uh. He smells more like a photo lab.
Homer: Stop it, both of you! Grampa smells like a regular old man, which is more like a hallway in a hospital.
Marge: Homer, that's terrible! We should be teaching the children to treasure the elderly. You know, we'll be old someday.
Homer: (Gasps) My God, you're right, Marge! You kids won't put me in a home like I did to my dad, would ya?
Bart: Well
Homer: (Screams) Marge, what do we do!?
(The Simpson family arrives at the Springfield Mall.)
Lisa: This place is lookin' a little run down.
Bart: Yeah, hasn't been the same since they murdered the Mayor's dad here.
(at Aunt Gladys' funeral, Lisa goes up to the casket)
Lisa: Goodbye Great Aunt Gladys. I'm sorry I didn't get to know you better
Bart: (in a raspy voice from behind the casket) Don't worry about it
(Lisa runs away screaming; Bart laughs)
(Lisa confronts Kang and Kodos.)
Lisa: Well, why were you trying to make us eat all the time?
Kang: Make you eat? We merely provided a sumptuous banquet. Frankly, you people made pigs of yourselves.
Serak the Preparer: (Crying) I slaved in the kitchen for days for you people. And
Kang: Well, if you wanted to make Serak the Preparer cry, mission accomplished.
Homer: Moe...Moe...Moe.
Marge: Bart, are you going to Moe the lawn today?
Bart: Okay, but you promised me Moe money.
Marge:I Moe, I Moe!
Homer: Moe...Moe...Moe.
Lisa: When Bart's done, can we Moe to the Moevies? There's a Moetinee.
Marge: Of course, All work and Moe play makes Moe a Moe Moe.
Bart: Moemomoemoe?
Marge: Momomoemoe!
Lisa: Moememoemoemoe!
Bart: Momomomoe.
