The Simpsons

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The simpsons
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Lisa: You could do what Everybody Loves Raymond did.
Krusty: Go off the air while I'm still good? That horse has left the stable, gone to the glue factory and has been used to make art projects.

Principal Skinner: I must say, Lisa, it was amusing to see you thoroughly de-high-horsed.
Lisa: That isn't a word.
Principal Skinner: Oooh, back on the saddle she climbs.

Excellent! (tents fingers) What am I doing? Untent! Untent!

Homer: I'm sorry, Homer Junior. You'll occupy an idealized place in my heart that no one can ever quite fill.
Bart: Therapy, please.
Lisa: Me too.

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Willie: You want me to carve it into a thank-o-lantern?
Lisa: No, this is good.
Willie: Well, this knave's got to carve something.

Lisa: Bart, why is the dad I've always wished for creeping me out?
Bart: I don't know, cause you're incapable of experiencing joy?
Lisa: Point taken.

Bart must not be judged by these kids. But by a jury...of kids, mostly these kids...there's only so many kids.

Lisa: Why does someone become a bully?
Jimbo: Neglect.
Dolph: Abuse.
Kearney: I'm a Cubs fan.

Milhouse: I can't wait to use your moves on Lisa.
Lisa: Eww. On every level, eww.

Bart: All you need to know is that I'm a politeness monster who eats "pleases" and farts "thank yous", ma'am.
Lisa: I'm exactly the kind of kid he's pretending to be.

All my extra credit points are like frequentflier miles on a bankrupt airline.

I love that dog...but that is one long, stupid name.

Displaying quotes 13 - 24 of 446 in total

The Simpsons Quotes

Wow, now I see why they call you Miss Hoover. You must have been vacuuming for an hour.

Bart

Homer: (Wearing glasses) The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side!
Man: (From inside a bathroom stall.) That's a right triangle, you idiot!
Homer: D'oh!