Liz: You're always a high strung perfectionist.
Jenna: I prefer soul sucking monster.

What Bill O'Reilly erotic novel are you living in?

Hey, I don't bail. I am still watching Smash, Criss.

Liz: I don't want to be with Spencer!
Criss: And yet you're silent about Grant.

I could dip into my 401 K...is something I've heard old people say in commercials.

You're being so transvaginal right now.

Liz: Why didn't you just take the subway?
Kat: Because that's not romantic. Watch a movie Liz.

I watched like three MythBusters last night so I'm pretty exhausted, if you know what I mean.

Liz: Has anyone ever known a good person named Kevin?
Jack: Kevin Garnett helped me move once. Kevin Costner cooked me dinner after a bad breakup.

Jacky and I know how we feel. We don't have to say it out loud like a couple of gays getting married in jean shorts in Provincetown, while I'm just trying to enjoy an ice cream on the pier.

Colleen

If you're ordering me an edible arrangement to say thanks, I'd prefer a meat one.

Liz: Why are you so heavy?
Tracy: Cause so much of me has died.

30 Rock Quotes

Fine, I will try the other location. But frankly, LaDonica, you have not been real helpful.

Kenneth

I believe that when you have a problem, you talk it over with your priest, or your tailor, or the mute elevator porter at your men's club. Then you take that problem and you crush it with your mind vice. But for lesser beings, like curly haired men and people who need glasses, therapy can help.

Jack