Season 3, Episode 1: "Aquamom"
Ari [holding up finger]: What the f**k is this?Lloyd: Your finger.
Ari: It's dust Lloyd, it's f**king dust! Why is it here?!
Lloyd: The cleaning staff's on strike. You know that.
Ari: They strike, you work. Your Asian, you're supposed to be a neat freak
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Lloyd: You do have a lovely view.
Ari: It's West f**king Hollywood, Lloyd! And what I got is nine people and 1,400 square feet
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Ari: The gym, Lloyd! The f**king gym!
Lloyd: It's pretty urgent.
Ari: It's pretty urgent that in the 15 minutes a day I have free, I take the time to keep this body fit. And not just so you have a great ass to look at, I want to live!
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James Woods: So, this is the s**thole he's been working out of, huh?
Lloyd: You haven't been up here yet?
James Woods: No, he's hiding this place like Anne Frank
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Season 2, Episode 12: "The Abyss"
Lloyd: How'd it go?Ari: How'd the f**king Bay of Pigs go, Lloyd?
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Lloyd: E was just in there. Terrence offered him a job.
Ari: As what, his f**kin pool boy?
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Season 2, Episode 11: "Exodus"
Ari: Listen, Lloyd, do you want to make it? Or do you want to fold shirts at a Chinese laundry? Now pledge. Nod if you understand what I'm saying.Lloyd: I understand.
Ari: You can't just f**king nod?
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Lloyd: Mr McQuewick's on the phone. He'd like to speak to you.
Ari: To apologize? Send him down?
Lloyd: He wants you to come up?
Ari: He won't come down?
Lloyd: He asked me to send you up.
Ari: He asked you to send me up. Did you tell him that don't send me anywhere? Did you tell him that no one sends me anywhere in this f**king agency? Did you tell him that I send myself where I want?
Lloyd: No, I just said okay.
Ari: You tell him to come down.
Lloyd: He'd like to speak with you
Ari: You see that Lloyd? No surrender.
Ari [on the phone]: Terrance, how are you?
Terrance: Ari, get your ass up here!
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Ari: Lloyd, are you with me? Lloyd, what are you doing? You and me we have a special bond. Come on let's go.
Lloyd: Ari, swear to me that will never again say anything offensive to me about my race or sexual orientation.
Ari: I can't swear to that, but I promise I will always apologize after
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Lloyd: Ari, I've worked 18 hours a day to save up the money to put myself through Stanford Business School. While I was there, I cleaned the cafeteria during hours I wasn't studying and still graduated top of my class. Only to take a job delivering mail to unappreciated overpaid little cocksuckers, then to finally get the big promotion that would allow me to answer your phones and be both racially and sexually harassed for the next nine months. But I know the endgame, and you, Ari Gold, you are it! So stop your f**king whining and go into your gorgeous three million dollar house, with your beautiful goddess wife, and figure out how you're going to make both of our lives happen tomorrow!
Ari: That was a good speech Lloyd. Man if I was 25 and liked cock, we could be something
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Total Quotes: 67
