Stewie: (Comes into the bedroom) Lois! Lois! Lois! Lois! Lois! Lois! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Mama! Mama! Mama! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Mum! Mum! Mum! Mum! Mummy! Mummy! Mumma! Mumma! Mumma!
Lois: What!?
Stewie: Hi! (Giggling and running out of the room)

Peter, are you just trying to take a knee until the end of the show? Peter that's not gonna work, you can't just --

I'm from Alderaan. It's kind of the Mississippi of the galaxy.

Peter: Lois, do you have any idea what i'm looking at right now?
Lois: Peter, we're not doing this again.
Peter: I am at Harvard, the smartest school in the country. And they have...
Lois: Peter, breakfast for dinner is anarchy!
Peter: It's fun, Lois! It's whimsical!
Lois: It's ridiculous! Pancakes are not a nighttime food!
Peter: You're ridiculous!

Oh my God. You're 40!?

Lois: I think I'm pregnant.
Peter: Oh, are you sure it's yours?

Genie: I am here to grant you three wishes.
Lois: Peter, three wishes. Oh this is so exciting.
Meg: I want a new hat
Chris: I want a new hat
Stewie: I want them to have new hats!

Director [to Lois]: You got a nice wiggle, baby. You wanna be in a movie, huh? A little girl/girl action maybe?
Lois: Peter!
Peter: Good luck buddy, I've been barkin' up that tree for 17 years

Lois: Peter, I was up all night waiting for you, where were you?
Peter: Where was I? Where were YOU?
Lois: Out drinking. But I got back at two

Lois: Peter, there's a hooker on the bed!
Peter: Stay perfectly still, Lois, their sight is based on movement.
Hooker: Where'd ya go?

Lois: Chris, I'm gonna teach you to be an affable, desirable young man, who doesn't smell like the inside of a wool hat.
Chris: Why you gotta break balls?

Meg: Wow, this looks just like my room at home.
Lois: Yeah except for the all the trophies and pictures of friends.

Family Guy Quotes

Brian: What's on his arms?
Stewie: Those are waterwings. He was terrified of the water.

Stewie: (Comes into the bedroom) Lois! Lois! Lois! Lois! Lois! Lois! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Mama! Mama! Mama! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Mum! Mum! Mum! Mum! Mummy! Mummy! Mumma! Mumma! Mumma!
Lois: What!?
Stewie: Hi! (Giggling and running out of the room)