Benny just remember that in the end I loved you like a good pal.

Lois [about poisoning Frank]: How can he suspect me when I didn't do anything? That's crazy!
Bill: Fine, fine. So who is gonna pick him up?
Lois: Why don't you go pick him up?
Bill: I hate him as much as you do.
Lois: Then maybe you did it!

Lois [about her and Bill's father]: We're gonna be legally married!
Bill: Congratulations.
Lois: No gifts, please!
Bill: Are you happy?
Lois: Well, you know me. I have a naturally cheerful countenance. But anyway, I just wanted to let you know. We won't be moving in together which means we'll probably get along a little better. But it won't matter any way. He won't be around much longer

Hollis: It would appear that we have a situation.
Lois: How dare you lay a hand on my son.

(to Bill) Want a sandwich? I've got some bread and some...cream cheese.

At this particular moment Frank, we're all we got. We've got to be able to count on each other.

Bill [about his father]: He's gotta get to a doctor.
Lois: No! Remember when he got his fingers caught in the fan? You said doctors and he was fine!
Bill: He needed 23 stitches!

I'm glad my son divorced you.

Big Love Quotes

Sarah: Why can't we just hire a babysitter like everyone else?
Barb: Because we're not everyone else

Margene: Does that mean you miss me more?
Bill: Officially... I miss you guys all the same.