Modern Family

Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABC
Modern family
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Luke: Here's something I didn't know about mannequins: They don't have a wiener.

Luke: Dad's like crazy fun, but you're nice.
Claire: I'm nice?!?
Luke: Well, not now.

I think I found a place where I can sell this organ. Can you drive me to the black market?

Luke: Is that Mom's apron?
Phil: It's an apron.

Luke: I've heard The Jonas Brothers get nervous before every show.
Phil: Not Kevin.
Luke: Especially Kevin!

I brought you some soda, but I couldn't find any straws, so you'll have to drink it like cats.

I got scared because the cabinet didn't fall down.

Phil: Wow, this place has really changed. Time marches on, huh? See that Starbucks down there, you know what that used to be?
Luke: An orange grove?
Phil: No, a Burger King. You can still see some of the architecture.

My dad says the greatest singer who ever lived is Peabo Bryson.

Manny: Oh no, who will pee all over the bathroom floor?
Luke: I was brushing my teeth at the same time...you try to do that.

I had bread, I had cheese, and I had an iron. What was I supposed to do?

We had a fire drill last night. Not the hotel. Just me and Manny.

Displaying quotes 61 - 72 of 86 in total

Modern Family Quotes

What could be more natural than your mother’s tongue in your ear?

Gloria

It's a body spray called Sex Grenade. One of the divorced dad's in the hotel recommended it.

Luke