I'm gonna save my dad's life!

Mac: Bro you texted us 911 what’s the emergency?!
Charlie: Uh, well, our friendships in danger!

Dennis: We gotta get back in our apartment man.
Mac: Yeah I know, I hate Dee.
Dennis: Yeah I hate her.


Mac: Did you do that?
Dennis: You know what? I think I did.
Mac: Yeah I think I saw you!

Dennis: It was Mac's stupid plan.
Mac: Then why did you scratch me?
Dennis: Because you annoyed.

How can a whole group have the same idea? What, do they say it all at once? That's ludicrous.

Oh, and also, he murdered and ate his family.

Mac: I don’t think you were there.
Cricket: I was there Mac, my whole face burned off, I was there.

He needs to be absolved so he can go crazy again.

Be the caboose.

Frank: So, what could we talk about?
Mac: A Creatin shit!

He's engaging you physically.

It's Always Sunny Quotes

With real power comes real responsibility and I don't want any of that shit. I just want the money and the illusion of power. And puss.

Dennis

Dennis: I am having feelings again. Like some kind of fourteen year old kid. You remember, feelings right?
Mac: Yeah. I have feelings every single day of my life.
Dennis: Do you?
Mac: Are you saying you don't have feelings?
Dennis: What I'm saying is a built up a shell.. a shell around myself. A cold, calculated shell that couldn't be broken by anything but marriage.