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Manny: How's my hair?
Jay: Hold on, what are you wearing there? That looks like an old Christmas tree skirt
Manny: It's a traditional Colombian pioncho, I want my new classmates to know I'm proud of my heritage
Gloria: I think you look very handsome, lindo!
Jay: Oh really? Am I driving him to school or is he gonna ride his burro?
- Permalink: How's my hair? Hold on, what are you wearing there? That looks...
Jay: I don't like watching football with people that don't care about the game, they talk
Manny: You talk during my football games
Jay: For one thing it's called soccer and your team scored two goals all season, I'm not risking much
- Permalink: I don't like watching football with people that don't care about...
Jay [to Manny]: Let's go buddy, it's school time. Oh, and Gloria, if you want to get together with the girls later I can just, you know, watch the football game or something.
Manny: That means he wants to watch a football game.
Jay: I'm not talkin' to you. And what're you drinking coffee for anyway?
Manny: It's my culture, I'm Colombian.
Jay: Oh yeah, what part of Colombia are those French toaster sticks from?
- Permalink: Let's go buddy, it's school time. Oh, and Gloria, if you want to...
Ugh, kids, you don't have to tell me, my school is full of them
- Permalink: Ugh, kids, you don't have to tell me, my school is full of them
Manny: I wish I could stay home with you and fly toy airplanes.
Jay: These aren't toy airplanes, Manny. These are models and they're very complicated. You wanna fly one of these, you gotta be familiar with air foyle, drag, lift and thrust, and these are all principles of aerodynamics.
Manny: The box says twelve and up.
Gloria: You can fly toy planes with Jay next time. Today you have to spend time with Luke.
Gloria: Because his mother invited you, so you go. Family needs to be close, right Jay?
Jay [looking at the box]: I'm pretty sure this is a typo
- Permalink: I wish I could stay home with you and fly toy airplanes. These...
One time my dad was struck by lightning. That's why he can drink as much as he wants
- Permalink: One time my dad was struck by lightning. That's why he can drink...
Manny [about his father]: He's not afraid of anything, he doesn't wear a seat belt when he drives. He killed a bear once
Jay: Oh yeah? Was the bear in the passenger seat?
- Permalink: He's not afraid of anything, he doesn't wear a seat belt when he...
Jay: I'll give you fifty dollars if you don't go through with this.
Manny: I'm eleven.. What am I going to do with money?
Jay: What are you going to do with a sixteen year old?
- Permalink: I'll give you fifty dollars if you don't go through with this. ...
Manny: She has a boyfriend.
Gloria: Ohh I'm sorry mi niÃ±o
Manny: I gave her my heart and she gave me a picture of me as an all time Sheriff. That was pretty stupid of me, wasn't it?
Gloria: No mi amor, It was brave right Jay, brave.
Jay: Well well, you'll know better next time, come on let's get a pretzel
- Permalink: She has a boyfriend. Ohh I'm sorry mi niÃ±o I gave her my he...