The librarian told me that one day I'll be a great catch.

I always thought of women as the more evolved sex, but after today...I've seen things Jay.

Luke: My mom hates messes.
Manny: I'm familiar with Claire.

She's like a dream, wrapped in a wish, poured into jeggings.

Cam, our shared bathroom is not the place to work out whatever's going on here!

I understood " crazy old witch" "go kill yourself" then "I love you."

I love gambling, it's so easy!!

Claire: Oh thank God, here comes Phil and the butterball.
Manny: Hey, I have a name!!

Forbidden dance floor, only makes me want it more.

Stop marching, you're dancing not invading Poland.

Manny: I guess I'm too proud to ask for help.
Jay: Are you kidding? She still cuts your steak.

Jay: He wants more wow. What does that even mean?
Manny: It's the Bieberization of America.

Modern Family Quotes

By the way, do not look up peeing games on the internet.


I'll admit it. I'm turned on by powerful women.
Michelle Obama, Oprah, Condoleezza Rice, Serena Williams… Wait a minute.

Phil Dunphy