Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABC
Modern-family

Manny: I guess I'm too proud to ask for help.
Jay: Are you kidding? She still cuts your steak.

Jay: He wants more wow. What does that even mean?
Manny: It's the Bieberization of America.

Manny: I wanna be home-schooled.
Gloria: Really Manny? You want me to learn you English?

You'll never go broke playing into a rich guy's ego. Write THAT down.

Manny: Hello Ma'am, do you love Christmas?
Neighbor: Actually I'm Jewish.
Manny: Well then you must appreciate a good value.

Jay, I'm gonna need you to cut me a check.

Do we book our spa appointments through you or?

Yeah, I'm just water-washing my hands.

I have a tennis racquet upstairs I only use as a bubble-bath frothier.

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