Margene Heffman Quotes
You cant run, we will be all exposed.
Margene: Nicki, can I tell you a secret?
Nicki: If you must
Barb [about Nicki]: Has she said anything to you about what she's wearing?
Margene: Nuh-uh.
Barb: Just try to get her to wear something a little more... I mean, she sticks out like a sore thumb.
Margene: Oh...
Barb: I don't want to hurt her feelings, but it's like walking into the Governor's mansion with a sign that says "Practicing Polygamist". She'll never listen to it coming from me, she'll think I'm attacking her. I mean, even just offer to do her hair
Nicki: Margene, you're grounded.
Margie: Excuse me?
Nicki: Or you're on probation. You do not involve our kids in your filthy habits.
Margie: No, no way. You have no authority over me.
Nicki: Authority? Wait just one minute. I'm second, you're third, get it?
Margie: Second's not first. It's nothing
Margie: I am a terrible wife. I should've never married your father. And your mother.
Sarah: And Nicki.
Margie: Especially Nicki
Margie: Bennie, do you remember a few years ago a vote about me?
Ben: Which one?
Margie: The one about me joining the family.
Ben: Which one?
Nicki [about Barb]: Do you think she's happy for me? About the baby?
Margie: Of course. She loves babies. Sometimes I think she wishes my boys were hers.
Nicki: Sometimes I think they wish the same thing
Margene: Your father said we cannot call a plumber.
Ben: I know.
Margene: Do you think he's a cheapskate?
Ben: Umm, I believe the word is thrifty
Nicki: You're the weak link, Margie.
Margie: What?
Nicki: We have to be realistic. You can't keep a secret like me and you're not a good liar like Barb.
Barb: What do you mean I'm a good liar?
Nicki: With the neighbors. You're so effortless; you're pro
Barb [seeing Nicki come home with shopping bags]: How's the "family emergency" going?
Margie: Yeah, somebody die at The Gap?
[Bill sneaks into Margie's bed]
Margie: Where's Nicki?
Bill: What??
Margie: It's Nicki's night. You gotta go.
[Bill sneaks into Nicki's bedroom]
Nicki: Honey, what are you doing here?
Bill: It's our night!
Nicki: It was. Didn't you get my message? See the Post-It?
Bill: Post-It?
Nicki: I traded with Barb
Margene: Does that mean you miss me more?
Bill: Officially... I miss you guys all the same.
