Favorite Mark Brendanawicz Quotes
I can't wait to talk to Justin again. Last time he told me about how he snorkeled with whale sharks in Madagascar. That was after I told him that I sometimes go swimming at the Y.
Leslie: Everybody stop talking, until Justin gets here. Don't use up your stories.
Mark: Well I think somebody from Animal Services is going to get canned-
Leslie: Oh my god, what part of no talking do you not understand? Please have a good time and shut your mouth.
Mark: I knew, eventually, somehow being in a relationship with you would totally pay off.
Ann: I bought him some actual towels. He was using a bathrobe. And I bought him some other things that humans usually use, like shampoo.
Tom: [imitates Ann] Mark, what are we doing tonight? [imitates Mark] Oh, I don't know, Ann. We could do the usual boring stuff like eat some chicken salad with some crackers or watch some pay per view. Or, we could go to my nightclub and do some dancin'.
Mark: I don't think so, man.
Tom: You'd never have to beg for sex again.
Mark: Ron, none of this is up to code.
Ron: Sure it is. It's up to the Swanson code.
Ron: I understand that city codes exist. And I know why they exist. And I understand that you enforce them.
Mark: OK.
Ron: OK, good talk. Can you sign off on my plans now?
Andy: Ron, do you think maybe I should put Mark in a headlock? That way I can show everyone how to escape a pervert.
Mark: In the scenario you just laid out, you're the pervert. You understand that right?
Andy: You wish.
Mark: Leslie, can I run something by you really quick?
Leslie: Sure, I love having things run by me.
Mark: I feel like you're being sarcastic right now.
Leslie: No, no. I'm not. I genuinely love it. Run it by me. Go ahead. Go, go, go.
Leslie: Can you get five eagles? No, get 10 eagles!
Mark: Leslie-
Leslie: No, you're right. It's your life. Give her as many eagles as you want.
Shauna: OK, well, since we're, you know romantically involved, I won't print any of it
Anne: That's great, thank you so much
Mark: Well, you know I wouldn't say romantically involved... going forward
Anne: (rolling her eyes) Oh my god!
Leslie: Just to be clear, that was a friend punch. There was no flirtatious meaning behind that punch I just gave your arm.
Mark: I do understand. You've made it abundantly clear that there is absolutely no romantic element to our relationship.
Ann: I'm sorry, you don't think it's weird that my ex-boyfriend lives in a tent in the pit outside my house?
Mark: It's....not....ideal.
