How I Met Your Mother

Marshall Eriksen Quotes (Page 9)

Marshall: I can't wait to tell the gang. This is one of those moments you dream about! Guys ... Lily and I ... are having unprotected sex. I just got the chills.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Marshall: Why is Ellen DeGeneres in our bedroom?
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Marshall: Please, I don't have any baggage.
Lily: Mommy issues.
Marshall: No.
Lily: Grandmother issues.
Marshall: Nah.
Lily: Great-grandmother issues.
Marshall: I just don't like when she picks me up!
 • Rating: Unrated

Marshall: Wait, you actually used Jed Mosly's catchphrase?
Ted: Oh yeah ... How do you know that's his catchphrase?
Marshall: [pauses] Hey, I wanted to see Avatar.
 • Rating: Unrated

Marshall: So, funny thing about Willem Dafoe. His name sounds like it's being spoken by a frog, then a parrot. Willem. DA-FOE! Willem. DA-FOE!
 • Rating: 4.8 / 5.0

Marshall: Aww ... Lilllly ... babieeeeees!
Barney: I hope Ted is miserable right now.
 • Rating: Unrated

Barney: Rule #83. If anything coming out of that child's mouth lands on me, I get to touch Lily's boobs.
Marshall: Dude, what is it with you and my wife's boobs tonight?
 • Rating: Unrated

Barney: I've got five tickets to Robots vs. Wrestlers!
Ted: That is awesome!
Barney: You've heard of Robots vs. Wrestlers?
Marshall: Not at all!
Ted: But we're assuming it's some sort of sporting event putting robots ... against wrestlers!
Barney: That's exactly what it is!
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Marshall: Our new sleeping arrangement will only bring us closer together. Now get out of my bed.
 • Rating: Unrated

Lily: I think we should get separate beds.
Marshall: YES! A mini-fridge! And separate beds.
 • Rating: Unrated

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