How I Met Your Mother

Mondays 8:00 PM on CBS
How i met your mother

Marshall: Did you catch the game last night?
Robin: Yeah, nail biter.

Robin: Hey Captain, quick question. What do you think about the Jonas Brothers?
Marshall [covering the right half of the Captain's face]: He hates that he loves them.

Ted: A-ha! When a second uterus plumped becomes...
Marshall: Dude.. feel the room.

Marshall: Oh you're wearing a flower.
Barney: Thank You!
Marshall: I didn't compliment, just observed.

Looks like Pocahontas has a couple of wounded knees.

I love you and I'm going to love the crap out of whatever kind of baby we have.

Marshall: Hey, Barney, that prime rib was surprisingly good, but it's ten thirty in the morning I don't really need to see a lady get naked and dance.
Barney: Oh Esther gets naked, but she doesn't dance... That WAS my card!

Marshall: I can't do this. I can't stop thinking about you and Robin.
Lily: Oh I've had that a few times. just lean into it and let it fuel things.

Oh that's super interesting but you have a small penis.

Baby these satin sheets are slippery. Papa needs traction.

Come on, Spice Channel!

Eriksen men are hella fertile.

Displaying quotes 97 - 108 of 327 in total

HIMYM Quotes

Whatever you do in this life, it's not legendary, unless your friends are there to see it.

Barney

You are the love of my life. Everything I have and everything I am is yours. Forever.

Barney
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