Meg Griffin Quotes (Page 5)
Season 6, Episode 5: "Lois Kills Stewie"
Meg: Wait a minute. Chris are you clapping?
Chris: Yeah.
Lois: So your hands are free.
Chris: Yeah.
Lois: Stewie didn't tie up your hands.
Chris: No he must've forgot.
Lois: You realize we've been sitting here for 14 hours.
Chris: Well get pissy if you want, Mom. I've enjoyed the time we've had as a family.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 6, Episode 4: "Stewie Kills Lois"
Judge: Mr. Foreman, how say you?
Foreman: We find Peter Griffin guilty of murder in the first degree.
Peter: Oh no!
Bruce: Oh no!
Brian: Oh no!
Meg: Oh no!
Chris: Oh No!
Kool-Aid Guy: (Crashes through courtroom wall) Oh yeaaaah!
(slowly backs out)
Judge: Okay, can I ask everyone to please stop saying "Oh no" in this courtroom? Cause the f***ing Kool-Aid Guy's gonna keep showin' up. Thank you.
• Rating: Unrated
Season 6, Episode 2: "Movin' Out (Brian's Song)"
Carl: Hey, Meg.
Meg: Hey, Carl.
Carl: Why are you always here by yourself? Are you like a bitch or something?
• Rating: Unrated
Lois: So Meg, any luck in finding another job?
Meg: No, hardly anybody is hiring right now. The only job I could find was for a phone sex line and I sucked at it.
(cuts to living room, Meg is on the couch talking on the phone)
Meg: What am I wearing? Um, a hat, and glasses. What kind of underwear? Um, I don't know, big underwear I guess. I'm sorry, what? Oh, what would I do to you? Well, um, I guess maybe we'd get pizza, and we could watch House?
(Cuts to Peter upstairs, also on the phone)
Peter: Alright, I am totally flaccid, but thank you anyway ma'am, I appreciate your time. (hangs up the phone)
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 5, Episode 17: "It Takes a Village Idiot, and I Married One"
Chris (moaning): Mom, how long do we have to wear these wigs?
Lois: Until our hair grows back, Chris.
Meg: Dad, you couldn't have gotten us anything more stylish?
Stewie: I don't think it's so bad, I feel rather like Mozart.
Brian: Hey Stewie, play Haydn.
(Stewie plays toy piano, Meg, Lois, and Chris laugh and clap)
Brian: Now play Handel.
(Stewie plays again, gets cheers from Meg, Lois and Chris)
Peter: Play Peter Griffin.
Stewie: Ah, now that is a challenge.
• Rating: Unrated
Season 5, Episode 16: "No Chris Left Behind"
(When at the ballet)
Brian: Boy, this is gonna be long. So, ah, you kids develop any pot connections at your school yet?
Chris: Huh?
Meg: Yeah.
Brian: Ah. Lois, Meg's just gonna take me outside to poop.
• Rating: Unrated
Season 5, Episode 15: "Boys Do Cry"
Meg: Wow, look at this! I can't believe that Mrs. Bush kept all of these Planned Parenthood receipts.
Chris: Holy Cow! She's been scraped more times than a fisherman's knuckle!
• Rating: Unrated
Lois: Well, I got good news. I'm going to be the Church's new organist. (Both Brian and Meg talk simultaneously.)
Brian: Hey, hey, congrats.
Meg: Wow mom, that's great.
Chris: That means you'll play the organ.
• Rating: 1.0 / 5.0
Season 5, Episode 14: "No Meals On Wheels"
Peter: Oh boy, does it feel good to undo my butt flap.
Meg: Ew dad! We don't want to sit here and look at your ass.
Stewie: Yes, I'd rather look at Meg toweling off after a shower when she does that butt floss thing. (Cuts to scene where Stewie sees Meg toweling her ass.)
Stewie: (Low voice) Ew, ew, that's so disgusting, uh, uh, uh, I hope I don't ever accidentally use that towel. (Towel falls on Stewie.) Ahhhhh!
• Rating: 3.0 / 5.0
Season 5, Episode 13: "Bill and Peter's Bogus Journey"
Meg: Wow! Bill Clinton! Hey, uh, can I get a picture of you on my cell phone?
Bill Clinton: Sure.
(Bill lifts up his shirt right when the picture was taken and it shows a nipple ring.)
Bill Clinton: You know where I got that nipple ring? Old straddlin' Madeline Albright gave it to me.
• Rating: Unrated
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Total Quotes: 128




