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Tobias: Yes. Lindsay and I are planning a night of heterosexual intercourse.
Michael: You can just say intercourse.

Michael: What the hell is going on? Nellie is not a, uh, uh, a prostitute.
Gob: Of course, she is. Oh, but I can see where the misunderstanding is. You didn't know. (yelling to Nellie in the background) Maybe we can give him a family discount!
Michael: Family discount is right, Gob. This is the sister I've been talking about.
Gob: Maybe I should have been getting a family rate ... (breaking down) Oh, my God.

Lucille: Michael. What a surprise.
Michael: Really? Were you expecting somebody else? Maybe, uh, one of your two daughters?
Lucille: Oh, Lindsay and Tobias never visit.

Michael: That might be an older sister that we've never met.
Lindsay: Wow! Look at the beak on that bird.

Lindsay: Well, why don't you just go to Dad and ask him who Nellie is, point-blank?
Michael: So, he can just cover it up and lie? I can't stand to hear one more lie out of this family.
Tobias: Oh, there's the woman I'm sexually attracted to.
Michael: Ok, but that's the last one.

So, you guys did know about this secret room, too.

</i> Michael

Jan: You never heard anyone in your family discuss plans to either travel to Iraq or do business there?
Tobias: Well, I spent so much time making sweet love on my wife that it's hard to hear anything over the clatter of her breasts and --
Jan Your witness.
Michael: I have nothing.

Narrator: ... and Michael discovers that he wasn't "N. Bluth" after all.
Michael: I have an older sister?
Narrator: So much for not abandoning family.

Michael: Nichael Bluth? Am I N. Bluth? Is he trying to set me up? If I'm N. Bluth, I'm going to prison.
Narrator: Nichael was worried.

Michael: Gob, I'm not going to turn this mock trial into some kind of --
Gob: You were going to say "mockery," weren't you?
Michael: I was in trouble, like, three words into that.

Doctor: You could be a groom. Bring a little girlfriend up there with you.
George Michael: Oh, I don't have a girlfriend.
Doctor: A sister then, or a cousin. 'Course, you're gonna have to kiss.
Narrator: Guess who liked that idea?

Michael: Hey. What's this?
Gob: Just practicing my testimony. Needed a fake witness box.
Michael: And you couldn't have just taken my stuff off the desk first, or unplugged my computer?
Gob: Justice is swift, Michael.

Displaying quotes 37 - 48 of 491 in total

Arrested Development Quotes

(holding stuffed animals) These are my awards, Mother. From Army. The seal is for marksmanship, and the gorilla is for sand racing. Now if you'll excuse me, they're putting me in something called Hero Squad.

Buster

Oh, mercy me! I forgot that we were in the colonies.

Mrs. Featherbottom