Miranda Hobbes Quotes
Miranda: Whatever happened to aging gracefully?
Carrie: It got old.
Miranda: Telling your friend to leave her husband is something you just don't do.
Samantha: If she does break up with him its your fault. If she doesn't break up with him, she knows that you think that she should and, therefore can never speak to you again. Either way you're screwed.
Sex is not a time to chat.
(Carries shows the group a card she got from Big)
Carrie: What do you think it means?
Miranda: It means rip up the card.
Samantha: And watch out for the thorns.
(They are all standing in front of the locker room doors of Yankee stadium waiting for the "New Yankee")
Samantha: (as a ball player walks in front of them) Did you see that bulge?
Miranda: Ummm....he was wearing a cup.
Samantha: Well honey, his cup runneth over.
All we talk about anymore is Big or balls or small dicks. How does it happen that four smart women have nothing to talk about but boyfriends? It's like seventh grade but with bank accounts. What about us? What we think, we feel, we know, Christ! Does it always have to be about them? Just give me a call when you're ready to talk about something besides men.
Miranda: Look at how crowded it is, what a sham.
Carrie: Will you lighten up? It's a Presbyterian church, not a Catholic one.
Miranda: Whatever! Catholics, Buddhists, Shakers, Quakers, all the same, all design to fuck up our sex life.
Carrie (hands her a bible) Here pray.
Miranda: Here they come, let's make a break for it.
Carrie: No, they saw me, I can't just pray and run.
Carrie: He introduced me to his mother as a friend, she never heard of me.
Miranda: Maybe, they're not that close.
Carrie: Don't lie, you're in a church.
Charlotte: Hey, there you are, we've been looking for you everywhere.
Carrie: So how's everything?
Miranda: She means have you and James done it yet?
Samantha: Uumm!
Samantha is crying
Carrie: What's going on, why are you crying?
Samantha: James has a small dick.
Carrie: Well, it's not the end of the world.
Samantha: It's really small.
Miranda: How small?
Samantha: Too small.
Carrie: Well, size isn't everything....
Samantha: Three inches.....
Carrie: Well....
Samantha: Hard!
Charlotte: Is he a good kisser?
Samantha: Oh, who the fuck cares! His dick is like a gherkin!
Miranda: Don't beat yourself up, you had certain expectations, and your disappointed.
Samantha: Why? Why? Why does he have a small dick? I really like him.
Miranda: I thought you loved him?
Samantha: Well..shrugs shoulders
