Miranda Hobbes Quotes
Miranda: I can't believe I'm going to say this, but it feels wierd without her here.
Samantha: That's such a Charlotte thing to say.
Charlotte: I can't sign that. I can't marry someone knowing they feel this way.
Miranda: Listen, this is just their opening offer, it totally standard you go back in a negotiate.
Charlotte: Negotiate? I can't even buy stuff on sale.
Miranda: Um!
Charlotte: What?
Miranda: This is a little unusual, he has you on a vesting schedule. For every five years that you're married you get a percentage of five hundred thousand dollars.
Charlotte: I'm only worth five hundred thousand dollars?
Miranda: Over thirty years.
Carrie: Well, maybe that's their wholesale price?
Miranda: And, if you have any boys, you'll get another hundred grand free and clear.
Carrie: How much for girls?
Miranda: Nada!
Carrie: Well, that's just bad buisness.
Carrie: Big's leaving his wife.
Samantha: I knew it.
Cahrlotte: Oh my God!
Miranda: No!
Carrie: He got drunk and told me at the furniture show.
Miranda: What was he doing at the furniture show?
Carrie: Drinking and leaving his wife.
Carrie: There should be some sort of city funded break-up housing, for those who find themselves in need.
Miranda: Really?
Carrie: Like a big orphanage, filled with white beds, where old boyfriends could think about what they did wrong, and cry themselves to sleep, in a clean safe environment.
Miranda: You can't live here.
Steve: It's not that bad.
Miranda: It's not that bad? It's the doorway to hell.
Charlotte: Trey, and I really love each other. In fact, I'm meeting his mother this week, and if all goes well...
Miranda: If all goes well, what?
Charlotte: Trey, is this close to proposing, I can feel it.
Carrie: Oh, my God!
Miranda: You just met. I've had pair of pantyhose longer.
Charlotte: Miranda, it's not logical, this is love. It's not logical, it's right, in my heart, I feel it's right.
Miranda: Okay, whatever!
Carrie: You think, maybe, you don't want him to move away?
Miranda: No, it's not that simple. My head tells me its time for him to leave, but, the idea of him moving to a basement apartment on the corner of depressing, and west shit street, really breaks my heart.
Miranda: Didn't you feel like punching him?
Carrie: No, it was too sad or something.
Miranda: I would've punched him
Charlotte: No, it is sad. How long has he been married, what, seven months?
Samantha: Um, the seven month itch.
Miranda: It has a lot to do with nutrition. I once dated a smoker and it affected how his tasted.
Carrie: They should put that on the pack, if they want to cut back sales.
Samantha: I'm dating a guy with the nastiest tasting spunk.
(the girls glare at each other and Charlotte gets up and leave)
Miranda: And she's never coming back.
Samantha: Well, I'm sorry, who else can I talk to about this?
Carrie: Might I suggest no one.
Samantha: You are my girlfriends, help me? Have you ever had this problem?
Miranda: Not really, but I have to admit, that it's never been a trip to Baskin Robbins.
Carrie, we can analyse this for years and never know the answer. I mean, they still don't know who killed Kennedy.
Miranda