Ned Flanders Quotes
(Homer seeks Flanders help to find out what happened to him.)
Homer: Flanders, why did you call the cops last night?
Ned: I had to--I heard a hubbub, Bub.
Homer: What did I do?!
Ned: Well, I can't say for sure, but as a Christian, I assume the worst.
- Permalink: Flanders, why did you call the cops last night? I had to--I he...
That concludes our Halloween show for this year. I just wanna say that for those watching this network, you're all going to Hell and that includes FX, Fox Sports, and our newest devil's portal, The Wall Street Journal. Welcome to the club!
- Permalink: That concludes our Halloween show for this year. I just wanna sa...
Ned Flanders: Top of the mornin', Tow-mer.
Homer: It's Homer, idiot.
Ned Flanders: (Chuckles) So it is. I'm just here to pay the fine for the Sunday School bus. You towed it with the kids still in it.
Homer: (Chuckles) I guess I'm more powerful than God now.
Ned Flanders: You know what they say: "With great power comes great responsibility."
Homer: Who said that?! I'll kill them with my power!
- Permalink: Top of the mornin', Tow-mer. It's Homer, idiot. So it is. I...
(Homer warms up his voice before a performance.)
Homer: (Singing) D'oh, d'oh, d'oh, d'oh, d'oh, d'oh, d'oh, d'oh. Woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo-hoo. Stu, stu, stu, stu-pid Flanders.
(Ned Flanders peeks in the dressing room.)
Ned Flanders: Why the crescendo, my dear, old friend-o?
Homer: (Singing) Get lost you waste of a mustache.
Ned Flanders: Okily-dokily.
- Permalink: D'oh, d'oh, d'oh, d'oh, d'oh, d'oh, d'oh, d'oh. Woo, woo, woo, w...
Ned Flanders: Reverend, would you like to try some of my devil's food cake?
Reverend Lovejoy: Is that really devil's food?
Ned Flanders: No, it's angel's food with chocolate on top.
Reverend Lovejoy: Mmm-hmmm, I thought so.
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Ned: Homer Simpson, I show you pity, and how do you repay me? With a kick in the kididdlehopper!
Homer: (laughs) "Kididdlehopper"!
Ned: That's not funny, it's how I swear!
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Homer: Ned, since you've let me spend time with your family, I want you to get to know my family. (they go to Moe's) Hey, everyone.
Homer: I'd like to introduce Ned Flanders, my best friend.
Moe: Hey, I don't want no one in here with their "evils of alcohol" rap.
Ned: Wait a second: you're the man at the hospital who reads to sick children.
Moe: (grabs Ned) If this gets out, the next words you say will be muffled by your own butt.
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Maude: Come on, Ned! Move this thing!
Ned: I can't! It's a Geo!
- Permalink: Come on, Ned! Move this thing! I can't! It's a Geo!
Marge: Homer! Are you planning to hit Ned Flanders with that pipe and steal his tickets?
Ned: (answers door) Huh? (Homer ges ready to hit him, but changes his mind)
Homer: Oh. Flanders, I decided I'd like to go to the game with you.
Ned: Well, get out the Crayolas and color me "Tickled Pink". Ooh, what's with the lead pipe, were you going to give my noggin a flogging?
Homer: Well, yeah.
(they both laugh)
- Permalink: Homer! Are you planning to hit Ned Flanders with that pipe and s...