Ned Flanders Quotes (Page 6)
Season 5, Episode 5: "Treehouse of Horror IV""
Devil Flanders: Now remember, the instant you finish it, I own your soul for--
(Homer has already scarfed the donut)
Homer: Hey, wait. If I don't finish this last bite, you don't get my soul, do you?
Devil Flanders: Well, technically no, but--
Homer: I'm smarter than the Devil. I'm smarter than the Dev--
(Flanders turns into a huge demon)
Devil Flanders: You are not smarter than me. I'll see you in Hell yet, Homer Simpson.
• Rating: Unrated
Lionel Hutz: First, some ground rules: Number one, we get bathroom breaks every half-hour.
Devil Flanders: Agreed! Number two, the jury will be chosen by me!
Lionel Hutz: Agreed. No, wait--
Devil Flanders: Silence! I give you the Jury of the Damned! Benedict Arnold, Lizzie Borden, Richard Nixon--
Nixon: But I'm not dead yet! In fact, I just wrote an article for Redbook.
Devil Flanders: Hey, listen; I did a favor for you!
Nixon: Yes, master.
Devil Flanders: John Wilkes Booth, Blackbeard the Pirate, John Dillinger, the starting line-up of the 1976 Philadelphia Flyers!
Simpsons: Ahh!
• Rating: Unrated
Season 5, Episode 4: "Rosebud"
Homer: Hey, Flanders! You smell like manure!
Ned Flanders: Uh oh...better cancel that dinner party tonight! Thanks for the nose news neighbor.
• Rating: Unrated
Season 5, Episode 2: "Cape Feare"
Marge: Bart... I'm going to get you..... some ice cream at the store since I'm saving so much money on Diet Cola!
Ned: Say your prayers, Simpson... Because the schools can't force you like they should!... Maude, these new finger razors make hedge trimming as much fun as sitting through church!
Edna: You're going to be my murder victim... BART! In our school production of Lizzy Borden, starring Martin Prince as Lizzy!
Martin: Forty whacks with a wet noodle, Bart!
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 5, Episode 1: "Homer's Barbershop Quartet"
Bart: Oh boy! Free trading cards!
Milhouse: Wow! Joseph of Arimathea! 26 conversions in A.D. 46.
Nelson: Whoa, a Methuselah rookie card!
Flanders: (chuckles) Well boys, who'd have thought learning about religion could be fun?
Bart: Religion?
Milhouse: Learning?
Nelson: Let's get out of here!
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 4, Episode 21: "Marge in Chains"
Ned: Watch Fox and be damned for all eternity.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Ned: Now Marge don't you worry, we've all had our brushes with the law.
(remembers)
Cop: Are you Ed Flanders?
Ned: No, Ned Flanders.
Cop: My mistake.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 4, Episode 19: "The Front"
Song: Hens Love Roosters
Geese Love Ganders
Everyone else loves Ned Flanders
Homer: Not me!
Everyone who counts loves Ned Flanders!
Ned: Knock that off you two it's time for church!
Rod: We're not going to church today!
Ned: What? You give me one good reason!
Todd: It's Saturday.
Ned: Oakily doakily-doo!
Song: Hens Love Roosters
Geese Love Ganders
Everyone else loves Ned Flanders
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 4, Episode 15: "I Love Lisa"
Ned: If you think I'm cuddly and you want my company, come on wifey let me know!
• Rating: Unrated
Season 4, Episode 14: "Brother from the Same Planet"
Ned: Hey Homie, I can see your doodle.
Homer: Shut up, Flanders.
• Rating: 4.2 / 5.0
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Total Quotes: 84