Nick Miller Quotes
I don't want a refund on my cruise and I don't want a refund on you!
Nick: My arms are so sore from doing so many push-ups.
Schmidt: That seems like a lie.
Jess: Nick calls birds 'wind-mice.' Nick says 'yahtzee' when he climaxes. He calls turtles 'shell-beavers.'
Nick: Well, that's what they should be called.
Nick: I know where you live!
Jess: And I live where you live!
There is something serious I have to tell you about the future. The name of my first-born child needs to be Reginald VelJohnson--I lost a bet to Schmidt.
Schmidt fired me and now I'll never get to use this briefcase I bought and it was $19!
What do you call a lunatic who's only got one case and no hobbies? Your worst nightmare.
When you put it like that, it sounds amazing...AND like prison.
Jess: Why does your bottom need to breathe?
Nick: It's like a plant. It needs sun and air.
I've got an uncle whose God-given name is 'Shifty.'
She is sleeping. By herself. Which is called napping.
Why lie? You know how many Millers have been or currently are in jail?